Love Hurts: 10 Iconic Horror Movie Villains Who Would Make Killer Dates
Brant Lewis
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It’s February, so the season of love has arrived. Some may loathe Valentine’s due to not having a date but fret not; I’m here to help. There is plenty of fish in the sea, and sometimes you must look within the darker parts of the ocean to find the hidden gems.
In John Swab’s new film Candy Land, one such character exists, innocently standing to the side, giving off an air of naivety: Remy (Olivia Luccardi). She’s sweet, she’s quiet, she’s obedient… Until she reveals her true nature. And that nature is soaked in blood.
So in honor of the film’s release and the heartfelt holiday at hand, here are ten iconic horror villains that would make perfect dates for this Valentine’s Day. Sure, they may not be conventional picks, but who wants a traditional Valentine’s Day?
Pearl from X/Pearl (2022)
Although a more recent horror icon, you cannot find a more dedicated and infatuated Valentine’s date than Pearl. She knows how to bring passion and has that X factor many girls lack. Whether you’re going on a date to the movies or spending the afternoon having a picnic watching the family alligator in the pond, she will make sure you have an unforgettable experience. Make sure to support her dreams of being a star, or you will get something worse than the silent treatment.
The Gill-man from Creature from the Black Lagoon (1954)
If you are looking for someone quiet and sensitive, look no further than the Gill-man. You can enjoy a pleasant stroll on the beach or a romantic date by the water with him. Sometimes you need a lover whose actions speak louder than words and protect you in any situation. Also, he served as the inspiration for the Amphibian Man in Guillermo del Toro’s The Shape of Water, which took the internet by storm. After all, you cannot do better than the original.
Christine from Christine (1983)
Sometimes you need a bad girl you cannot take home to your parents. She has that classic rebel personality and knows how to push your buttons. She’s unlike the other girls whose mean nature draws you under her spell. There’s nothing better than long nighttime drives with your best girl and that rock and roll on the radio. You will have a feel for your automobile at the end of your date.
Pinhead from Hellraiser (1987)
Give Pinhead a call if your love life feels stale and needs some excitement. The titular hell priest can introduce you to sensations of pain and pleasure that do not exist within our mortal realm. They have the experience to bring that spice to a relationship while helping to push you beyond your initially believed limits. Best of all, you can join their genderqueer pan polycule with the other cenobites in their dimension.
Mothra from Mothra (1961)
The titular kaiju has dramatically impacted the horror genre and even crossed internationally in pop culture. We all love strong independent women, and no one fits the Valentine’s Day bill better than Mothra. She is beauty, she is grace, and she will lay your city to waste. Plus, she has her entourage who constantly supports her. The only downside is complicated relationships with extended family which devolve into drag-out fights whenever they meet in person.
Daniel Robitaille from Candyman (1992)
Maybe you want someone sweeter. You want someone who grabs your attention and makes you feel like you’re in a daze whenever you date them. Daniel Robitaille, the titular Candyman, will fit the bill as you slowly fall in love with him. If you want to ask him out, only say his name five times in front of a mirror, where he will immediately appear. Many claim he’s an urban myth, but you can prove that wrong by going on a date with him.
Lady Dimitrescu from Resident Evil: Village (2021)
This answer should be self-explanatory, considering Twitter’s enthusiastic response to her first appearance. In short, who does not want to date a tall vampire lady who can easily crush you? Sure, you may have to donate some of your blood, but it’s a small price. Plus you can live in a fantastic castle and enjoy the sights in the nearby European village.
Hannibal Lecter from Hannibal (2013-2015)
What about someone who has class and a chic style? You need a guide to the current fashion style and the hottest food trends with a globetrotter mindset. Hannibal Lecter will make you swoon with a fantastic home-cooked culinary delight of a meal paired with the correct wines. And you can brag to your family about dating one of the most prolific doctors in the Baltimore region who graduated from John Hopkins. Even better, he only serves organic meals, but you better not closely inspect the meat.
Pamela Voorhees from Friday the 13th (1980)
It’s not easy being a mother, primarily when you work as a cook at one of New Jersey’s finest summer camps. Pamela is open to a relationship but makes it clear that nothing will ever come between her and her baby boy Jason. You will have to work a bit to soften her hard heart with some old-fashioned romance. Just be sure not to make her boy cry, or you can kiss your relationship and life goodbye.
Psycho Goreman from PG: Psycho Goreman (2020)
Beneath the hard, rugged exterior of alien warrior Psycho Goreman or PG lies a soft squishy interior looking for love across the cosmos. PG may look like a monster, but his passion is not monstrous. Only romance and hunky boys can satisfy his immense bloodlust. Sure, he may not understand all of the customs on Earth, yet you both will have fun playing games like crazy ball. In addition, he’s great with kids and pets making him a perfect partner.
Candy Land is available now on digital and VOD.
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