Hell Yeah! Rob Zombie’s Woolite is Here!

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Hey yeah, I’m the one that you wanted. Hey yeah I’m so superclean! Hey yeah, I’m the one that you wanted. Hey yeah I’m so superclean! Hey yeah, I’m the one that you wanted. Hey yeah I’m so superclean! Hey yeah, I’m the one that you wanted. Hey yeah I’m so superclean!

So here it is, kids! Rob Zombie’s Woolite (yes, Woolite) commercial we told you about a couple of months ago, which is “a very scary TV commercial for Woolite called ‘The Torturer’. Yes, I said Woolite. This ain’t yo Mamma’s Woolite,” said Zombie in a previous blog of his.

Honestly? We didn’t even know Woolite was still being made. Check out the goods below. Sure makes you wanna get your clothes dirty.

Hell Yeah! Rob Zombie's Woolite is Here!

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  • Shambling_in_Bandages

    The makers of Woolite employed the scruffiest-looking cunt on the planet to make the grubbiest-looking detergent advert as part of a cunning marketing campaign for their cleaning product, thereby associating their detergent with grime and mud in the minds of potential consumers? Absolute fucking logic fail, right there.

    Next up: Zombie to ‘direct’ ad for well-known chain of clueless restaurants; ad will include scenes of maggots crawling over dead animal carcasses half-buried in mud while some dirty-looking skank fingerfucks a donut.

    • Emy

      I’d say Woolite has a well established “public”. Which I am a part of… I just think Rob Zombie was the worst choice to make the case here. Their Stacy London ads made more sense. It is not the ad per se that is out of place (Woolite has pretty much always claimed to be able to keep your clothes looking great and not like tortured pieces by cleaning them with regular soap), but the choice of famous person they chose to associate with. Why would I want to have my clothes look like his? Yeah, bring back Stacy London.

      Oh well…

      I bet they paid him well.

      Sorry, too much time on my hands tonight it seems.

      • Shambling_in_Bandages

        I can honestly say I’ve never heard of Woolite, but perhaps they don’t sell it in my country (or maybe they do, but they use different names for it in different territories). I’m guessing it’s primarily a US brand?

        • Emy

          US and Canada at least (I used to live in Canada and have bought it in both countries).

          I would say there is a chance it is where you are but unless you have delicates, you probably would not think about buying it.

  • Sirand

    “Do a commercial, you’re off the artistic roll call, every word you say is suspect, you’re a corporate whore and eh, end of story.”

    -Bill Hicks

    • MouthForWar

      I dunno, I wouldn’t call David Lynch, David Cronenberg, Martin Scorsese, Akira Kurosawa, Darren Aronofsky, Guillermo del Toro or Wernor Herzog (who have all done commercials for big companies) corporate whores.

  • Blockbuster

    I’d say he’s sold out, but uhhhhhhh…hmmmm.