Fairy tales are hot again in Hollywood. You’ve got “Once Upon a Time” and “Grimm” on TV. Bryan’s Singer’s Jack the Giant Killer and Pixar’s Brave continue the trend on big screens this summer. And we’re getting not one, but two – TWO – Snow White movies. No wonder The Asylum is jumping on the trend with Grimm’s Snow White.
He partnered with John McClane in Die Hard & contended with Urkel on “Family Matters”. She died from a flesh-eating virus in Cabin Fever & had sex with a Broken Lizard in Club Dread. Watch this trailer to see if Reginald VelJohnson & Jordan Ladd can survive a catastrophic Air Collision.
He won the Civil War. Freed the slaves. Slayed the vampires. Even found time to kill Confederate zombies. No wonder Abraham Lincoln is considered our greatest President. That last bit of Lincoln-ism will be the subject of the latest Asylum mockbuster Abraham Lincoln vs. Zombies.
Oh, Brooke Hogan. So lovely. So shapely. You look so good sandwiched between the dual jaws of a giant-ass killer shark, blood pooling up around you in the water. The only thing that could make this any better is if your dad, Hulk Hogan, showed up to drop the leg (and have it bitten off) on this non-stop killing machine!
Ah yes, kids! It's in the air. Everyone's just a little happier and smiling just a bit more. Festive decor lines the streets, we've been spiking our eggnog since Tuesday, and I'm finally done adding glitter and paint to my testicles (one red, one green) so I can dangle them like mistletoe anywhere I can that won’t involve me getting thrown into jail for the weekend.
Eye-catching artwork is something American DVD distributors seem to either take for granted or are just no damn good at, especially when it comes to selling B-movies. The Japanese, on the other hand, can make a $2 million Syfy TV movie look like a $200 million blockbuster. As a special Christmas treat, I’m here to gift you with 60 stunning examples showcasing the awesomeness of the artwork for Syfy and The Asylum Japanese DVD releases.
Not a day has passed since Foy uncovered the Asylum endeavor Nazis at the Center of the Earth that we haven't prayed to the video gods that it lives up to the zaniness of its moniker. Another piece of the puzzle has been uncovered in the form of the official artwork, and we have it for you right here!
If the History Channel's "Ancient Aliens" is correct, the notorious Nazi mad scientist Dr. Josef Mengele may have escaped with some of his SS brethren to another galaxy in a UFO. Or… If The Asylum is correct, Mengele and his living dead Gestapo escaped deep underground. The Asylum may be right about this one because they have photographic evidence of Nazis at the Center of the Earth.
Of all the upcoming blockbusters for The Asylum to do a mockbuster of, I commend the gutsy call made to ride the coattails of one that has already been the subject of much snickering and eye-rolling. Then again, they’re used to snickering and eye-rolling. But by hiring Sonny Spoon and Apollo Creed, their American Battleship already has the cooler cast.
From the studio that brought you the Mega Shark movies, Mega Piranha, and 2012: Moby Dick comes The Asylum’s latest foray into monstrous sea life. Bear witness to Carmen Electra, Brooke Hogan, Charlie O’Connell, and a slew of nearly bare bodies as they fall prey to its twin jaws of toothy terror in the trailer for 2-Headed Shark Attack.
Have you ever heard any of the outlandish tales of Nazis hiding out in hollow earth following WW2? You will following next year’s release of The Asylum’s Nazis at the Center of the Earth. Can a former Lolita and a Starship Trooper save us from the Fourth Reich’s underground movement?
Starring Ving Rhames, Taryn Manning, Lesley-Ann Brandt, Johnny Pacar Directed by Nick Lyon
I rather enjoy how a zombie fleeing from certain death... uh, re-death... inspires Ving Rhames to declare the zombies are getting smarter in this clip from this Saturday’s Syfy premiere of Zombie Apocalyse, and then seconds later we see a zombie spastically windmilling its arms as it charges forth.
Darren Lynn Bousman’s 11-11-11 isn’t the only film cashing in on a numerically gimmicky date next month. The Asylum has its own 11/11/11 movie hitting DVD shelves on November 1st, and the trailer has just premiered in all its devil child glory.