Texas Man Arrested for Inserting Antiques Up His Kilt and Into Himself: “I just didn’t really know what to say” [Horror IRL]
Tyler Doupe'
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An antique enthusiast in Texas has run afoul of law enforcement after being observed ‘mishandling’ merchandise at more than one vintage shop.
Law & Crime reports that 60-year-old Mitchell C. Vest was taken into custody on criminal mischief charges following a visit to two antique emporiums in Spring, Texas.
The owner of the Antique Gallery of Houston says she witnessed Vest pick up a makeup brush and a Restoration Hardware piece, both placed under his kilt and into his rectum. After violating the wares, Vest placed them back on the shelf. The owner values the worth of the tainted merchandise at $130.
The proprietor of The Curiosity Shop reported reviewing security footage, which shows a man matching Vest’s description seemingly inserting a bottle opener and a tobacco tent can under his kilt and into his bum. She estimates the value of the damaged merchandise to be $74.
The owners of both businesses reported that the violated merchandise had to be discarded because fecal matter remnants were left behind.
Susan Golden, who manages the Antique Gallery, told KPRC in Houston, “I was just really in shock. I just didn’t really know what to say or think.” She also revealed to the network that she thinks she’s seen Vest in the store previously and that employees reported observing him browsing the store for “hours” before his most recent visit.
Vest was released from custody after posting a $100 personal bond. He will appear in court at a later date.
Wow. This is such a peculiar story. I don’t even know how to start unpacking everything. I know those who engage in activities of this ilk tend to enjoy the rush of doing something forbidden in the open. Thrill-seeking sexual behavior isn’t that uncommon. But if the allegations are true, Vest definitely ups the ante beyond garden-variety sexual mischief.
That’s all for this installment of Horror IRL. Stay tuned to the site for more true crime news as we uncover it.
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