Directed by Jérôme Boivin
Distributed by Lionsgate Home Entertainment
The life of a dog is a sweet one; you get to lay around, lick your balls and bang all the bitches you want with no long term commitment. As a dog, one could sit and plot death and disaster all day long with no one knowing. Never mind the pull toys, that’s exactly what the bull terrier Baxter enjoys.
Baxter tells the tale of the dog’s life via an inner French monologue as he tries to find himself the perfect master who would understand him. Much like the stages of human life, Baxter starts off his story the same as many of us do: in the care of an overbearing woman who won’t let us go outside to play. The pup doesn’t like this plan very much and quickly dispatches with the old lady thanks to a helpful flight of stairs in her home.
Next the bull terrier moves onto adulthood thanks to the care of a young couple who love to fuck and treat Baxter as their baby … until they have their own. If you thought pregnancy was a mood killer for men, just image what it does to a sociopathic canine. Everything starts to change when the new pink bundle of joy in brought home. Attention is taken away from Baxter and he longs for the days past.
It’s a good thing the young couple pay little mind to letting their baby roam around the backyard next to a deep fountain. Baxter seizes this opportunity and pushes the baby in, but barks too soon and his plan has failed. The near disaster prompts more abrupt changes to his living situation and Baxter is sent off to live with a boy named Charles.
OH HAPPY DAYS!!!
Baxter has finally found someone that understands him in Charles. The Hitler obsessed kid has built his own underground bunker in a junkyard, cares nothing for other people and is just all sorts of fucked up thanks to his parents. This little Nazi in training begins to prep Baxter to become a pure killing machine and all is looking good until she shows up.
A girl from Charles’ school sets her sites on the boy and things start to run afoul. Unable to control himself, Baxter mounts the girl’s dog and later has puppies which Charles takes into his care. As we already knew, this little fellow isn’t the most morally adjusted person on the planet and when Baxter finds his puppies dead and buried all bets are off. The boy he thought understood him was now Baxter‘s sworn enemy. The boy must die.
Why not? Well, Baxter is a very dark and twisted comedy that should be watched now that it has finally come to DVD. The 1989 French film deserves attention not because of the blood and gore, but due to its addicting nature. So little actual death happens, yet somehow it is impossible to walk away from the flick and not feel that you’ve just seen something bizarrely enjoyable.
From the opening with a Benny Hill look-a-like jerking off in the bushes, to the end where Baxter makes his final stand there is an overall sense of pity for nearly every character. Charles’ father having an affair with his teacher, who loses her father, who has just lost his best friend. Charles’ girlfriend is an abused creature with a constantly drunk father. Hell, Charles himself is to be pitied for having only two emotions: fear and hate. One long line of personal disasters and not one wreaks of emo-ticity. Holy crap, feelings of sorrow that are actually justified in a horror movie? Only the French.
Baxter is just all around fun to watch as he goes through day to day life among humans. His commentary on their behavior and how he views things like sex and babies raise more than a few chuckles. Watching a dog plot the death of a toddler should not make someone giddy with joy, but Baxter manages to do it. There’s magic there! It may be low on blood and sex, but it is such a unique experience that those things are easily forgiven.
Pissing off PETA
4 out of 5
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