Wedding Slashers (DVD)

 (click for larger image)Starring Maria Ford, Richard Lynch, Barry Adams, Paul Greenstein, Gene Lynn, Travis Young, Jessica Kinney

Directed by Carlos Scott

Distributed by Hart Sharp Video

Be it just as a guest or maybe even as a member of the wedding party itself, most of us have been to a wedding. Whether our attendance is due to an obligation to friend or family, we go. Most of the time we sit through whatever ceremony the couple has chosen, leafing through the program that seems to read more like a novella and finding ourselves praying for the kiss at the end … not really caring whether it is the bride and groom’s kiss or the sweet kiss of death.

Let’s face it; most weddings are lessons in tedium. You get dressed up, you drive to the church, you search for a parking space, once you get into the church you sit there for ages waiting for something to happen, the ceremony drags on for an eternity, and you begin to wonder if the marriage will last as long. Then you have to stand in line to get out of the church, drive to the reception, search for another parking space, find your name card, and pray that you aren’t seated with your creepy uncle with the glass eye that smells like he used his pine car freshener as cologne … AGAIN!

Next you stand in line for food you don’t recognize on a buffet that is being run by people you wouldn’t trust serving your pets and promise yourself that you’ll grab a burger on the way home. Trying to enjoy the chicken/beef/pork thing on your plate, you are treated to the soothing sounds of screeching feedback from a DJ in a bad tux. And to top it all off, you are later forced to participate in dances that make you realize there could never be enough alcohol in your system to dull the pain and humiliation.

Your experiences may vary…

Now with that in mind I’d like to cordially invite you to a wedding. Don’t worry; this is not the ordinary exchange of vows that you would rather gnaw your own arm off to get out of. I guarantee you’ve never been to a wedding like this. I will warn you though; being on the guest list at this little celebration of love could be hazardous to your health. This nuptial has a body count!

The color scheme for this wedding is white and red … blood red! From the “forty years ago flashback” to the stripper-filled “last night of single life” parties to the day of the ceremony, Wedding Slashers is dripping with gallons of gory goodness!

Jenna is getting married in the morning, and instead of the normal pre-wedding jitters she is faced with the fear that her big day is going to be ruined by her family. This concern has been shared by many a bride-to-be, but in Jenna’s case there is an all too real chance that she’ll never make it to the awkward “speak now or forever hold your peace” moment. Her family isn’t going to wait for that particular offer, and she knows it!

 (click for larger image)Without even sending regretful RSVP’s, guests start disappearing one by one. Unfortunately for the couple these no-shows are being more than just rude; they are being murdered in the most grisly fashions imaginable, and I don’t mean hideous bridesmaid dresses with puffy sleeves! Jenna tries to save her friends by calling off the wedding, but it is too late. No one is safe from this murderous family of wedding crashers!

A lot of marriages seem doomed from the beginning, but this one doesn’t seem to stand a chance in hell of even happening! With more to worry about than the non-refundable deposits they’re losing, Jenna and her fiancé, Alex, are forced into a life-or-death battle with Jenna’s freak filled family. They may not have been on the guest list, but they’ve shown up anyway and are dressed to kill, as the other guests are regrettably finding out.

Will their love keep them together, or will Jenna have to sacrifice herself to her incestuous family in order to save Alex from certain peril? Only time will tell, and you’ll have a front pew seat to watch the frightful festivities unfold.

Wedding Slashers is everything that most weddings wish they could be: fun, fast-paced, and enjoyable! It is filled with quick wit, a unique style, and enough blood, guts, and gore to satisfy just about any bloodthirsty appetite. The effects are well done and look great without being totally over-the-top with just enough camp to keep it interesting. I absolutely loved the overall look of the film.

Although I only got to see a review screener, the DVD will contain bonus features including over ten minutes of deleted scenes, the original trailer, and English and Spanish subtitles. I would highly recommend it for anyone who enjoys a good slasher flick or for that couple who has recently invited you to attend their wedding and you have no idea what gift to get them!

Special Features
Deleted scenes

3 1/2 out of 5

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Jon Condit

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