ClownTown (DVD)

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Clown TownStarring Brian Nagel, Lauren Elise, Andrew Staton

Directed by Tom Nagel


Their red noses…their fluorescent colors…the semi-happy painted faces that are supposed to drum up so much joy in both young and old alike… so why do these friggin clowns keep scaring the shat out of everybody? In director Tom Nagel’s eerie killer-mime flick, ClownTown, there unfortunately isn’t a whole lot of new material here to juggle your bowling pins, but enough campy activity to keep the jesters pleased.

The movie, which certainly opts for style over substance, tells the tale of a group of friends making their way across state to a concert, and along the way get sidetracked after one genius in the bunch manages to lose her cell phone back at a diner miles and miles ago. They manage to contact whomever is in possession of the phone and a very odd voice tells them to wait in the next town over, and it’ll be dropped off – sure, because that’s how all good cell phone-returning stories end, right? As the youngins wait (and wait and wait), it appears obvious that no one is coming to assist in this sleepy little town they’ve pulled off in. Let me rephrase that whole “sleepy-town” thing – this comatose borough out in the sticks is so dead, no amount of Re-Animator glow-juice could jolt this place back to life. Just when the kids have given up hope that no one will be joining them, that’s when the clowns-come-a-callin’. These greasepainted pranksters aren’t looking to deliver some joy, no – these psychotic merrymakers are here to spill some blood, and the kids are going to be donors whether they like it or not.

The clowns’ motive really remains unknown, other than to trap passers-by, and slaughter the crap out of them, and unfortunately there really isn’t a boatload of gore here to sail in. Matter of fact, the blood factor in this one is puddle-deep, but damn is it fun to watch these kooks slice and dice. One particular mime in question (David Greathouse), in my honest (and useless) opinion, might go down as the damn CREEPIEST clown I’ve ever seen on film, or in person in my life. Nagel takes every bit of past killer-clown film material and wrings it out like a blood-soaked rag, leaving this product bone-dry. Look, I could bash this film endlessly for its shoddy acting, inane thought processes of certain characters, seemingly dead-ended plot path-traveling, or lame special effects…wow, I guess I did do a bit of clubbing about the head and shoulders, didn’t I? Yet somehow, this film did provide me a bit of entertainment, and suffice to say it won’t be on any “best-of” lists to cap off 2016, ClownTown still will provide a touch of hilarity for those looking to see a little mime-crime goin’ down. This film should be in the books as a bonafide midnight-movie to check out after downing a few cold ones – just sit back, suspend a LOT of disbelief, and let the clowns take over.

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User Rating 3.75 (8 votes)
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