The Seen and The Unseen: China Has the Body of an Alien on Ice

The Seen and The Unseen: China Has the Body of an Alien on IceFirst our currency and now our conspiracy theories? Come on, Chinese, leave us something in the world already! Americans are a proud group of people. We invented Freedom (Dread Central does not condone this historical research), the Hot Dog and the Jersey Shore.

Even more important, we invented the Alien Conspiracy Theory starting with the whole Roswell crash thing.

The Chinese, in their attempt to rule the world, are trying to steal that from us. They want to become the alien conspiracy capital of the world.

In this post from UFO Sightings Daily, we are told the Chinese have a dead alien in their possession. How did they get it? According to the article, aliens tried to steal a man’s bicycle.

The man defended himself by throwing rocks. As the aliens ran, one of them ran into an electric fence (insert waa waaaa here). It died, or rather maybe “she” died? Anyway, as you might guess, when Chinese officials arrived to take away the body, they told the man not to talk about the incident.

Now, the best way to ensure people will talk about something is to tell them “not” to talk about something. Right? So, obviously, the Chinese government wanted the man to talk about it because they wanted to beat America at its alien conspiracy game. Come on, Americans, wake up and start sharing your alien conspiracy theories.

China Alien

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kiddcapone's picture

That gives me a new idea for a band name: Alien Camel Toe.

Submitted by kiddcapone on Fri, 06/14/2013 - 8:56pm.
nazo's picture

Nah, Extraterrestrial. E(c)T for short.

Submitted by nazo on Sat, 06/22/2013 - 7:11pm.
DavidFullam's picture

Yeah. Right. At least he was original enough to make it somewhat female.

Submitted by DavidFullam on Fri, 06/14/2013 - 8:31pm.

That alien has a nice pussy!

Submitted by LSD Zombie on Fri, 06/14/2013 - 2:15pm.
Jonathan Ryan's picture

Yeah, er, debated on whether to contribute to the wide spread alien porn problem on a family horror site. Cough....

Submitted by Jonathan Ryan on Fri, 06/14/2013 - 6:21pm.
Terminal's picture

Oh great, another G rated DC contributor. Siiiiiiiigh...

Submitted by Terminal on Fri, 06/14/2013 - 9:35pm.
Jonathan Ryan's picture

I think you turned off your sarcasm detector, Terminal.

Submitted by Jonathan Ryan on Sat, 06/22/2013 - 12:37am.
Terminal's picture

It's on the fritz.

Submitted by Terminal on Sat, 06/22/2013 - 1:33pm.
Jonathan Ryan's picture

I think there is a cream for that.....

Submitted by Jonathan Ryan on Sat, 06/22/2013 - 9:17pm.
Great band.
Terminal's picture

Great band.

Submitted by Terminal on Sat, 06/22/2013 - 10:30pm.
moderator Family site? You do know
Debi Moore's picture

Family site? You do know whom you're writing for, right? LOL

Submitted by Debi Moore on Fri, 06/14/2013 - 8:22pm.
Jonathan Ryan's picture

Sarcasm, my dear Woman in Black....sarcasm..... :P

Submitted by Jonathan Ryan on Sat, 06/22/2013 - 12:35am.
MonsterMash's picture

That looks fake as shit. Especially in the eyes.

Submitted by MonsterMash on Fri, 06/14/2013 - 11:46am.

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