Split Grindhouse? Joe Lynch Retorts!

Ed note: You may not know the name Joe Lynch yet, but something tells me when Wrong Turn 2 comes out later this year you’ll be wishing you did. Joe’s been a friend of the site for a while now and has some very strong opinions about the Weinsteins’ recent comments about possibly splitting up the Grindhouse movies in an attempt to recuoup their costs. We just had to get the man’s voice out there cause damnit, he’s right! Enjoy!

Joe Lynch on the last day of shooting Wrong Turn 2... and a shocker!I’m sorry but splitting up the Grindhouse movies is a terrible idea, but only for one of the “Mutant Twins Co-joined at Birth!!” Planet Terror. Think about it … would Rob Rod have REALLY made it at all as his next flick if he didn’t have QT’s involvement with another film attached, so that even if it’s a total joke, which it KINDA is (I really feel like PT is the “short” before the feature attraction; weightless, gloriously exploitive, gimmicky, fun as fuck, all positive notes mind you) he wouldn’t have to worry about it standing on its own? I think Death Proof, a fucking B Masterpiece (but that’s just me), has the substance, the mannered forward momentum and buildup, and even the kooky structure to fulfill an audience’s need for a feature.

Even if they put reels back in (which, I gotta admit, I have that Barton Fink feeling that Rob didn’t shoot the particular scene where it jumps from the love scene to the flaming BBQ joint; that was so perfect a joke it HAD to be planned so why shoot the preceding scene? ed note: he didn’t shoot it)…), I don’t think PT is gonna be as satisfying an experience as it was when we saw it this fateful weekend. I’m telling everyone I know to see it ASAP as if their life, or the state of horror, depended on it. I have faith that this weekend it does just as well with little drop off, pulling a Driving Mrs. Daisy and actually prove them wrong.

Grindhouse is Grindhouse … what’s next? “How’s this? Let’s re-release Full Metal Jacket by splitting the Training scene with the War scene? Research shows the 18-24 demographic loses interest after Gomer Pile paints the tile red with Synapse Slugs…” Sad but true, but I personally think that separating the film in two at ALL for European audiences is a mistake; if we’re even having the conversation of slicing the films in two, why WOULDN’T the art crowd who still refer to the medium as “Cinema” not embrace a bravura move experiment like Grindhouse?

Not only that, but has anyone thought about the trailers? What about Thanksgiving? WHAT ABOUT THANKSGIVING!??!?!

We just need to keep the GH love alive all week and make sure people who missed out, those douches who thought “I don’t want to see it opening weekend because Jesus rose from the grave” or “I didn’t want to go with the crowds” or whatever will actually experience the way it was intended and the way we saw it, not this “Plan B” that is going to both ruin the experience we’ll be telling our kids about one day while we’re watching it on our “iBrains”, but could be the next great failed attempted film rescue mishap since Exorcist: The Beginning … Sorry fellas but not everything is “Let’s Fix it in Post”. If people go out this weekend, maybe we can put this “separating films” bullshit to bed. I’m so pissed that my wonderful weekend enjoying being a movie lover will be stained with this business model bullshit.

Again, seeing Grindhouse this last weekend really was one of the best times at the movies I ever experienced and feel so strongly AGAINST the idea of dismembering it, especially if they are going to release it separate eventually on DVD. The theater experience is such a dying beast now with the advent of HD and home theater, and god, those film pops and splices made me remember why I loved movies, why I’d rather be in a dark room with a bunch of strangers than in the safety of my own home. Once the film is out of theaters…THAT’S ALL FOLKS.

So why not support it for as long as it lasts? We can’t let going to the movies die the nasty death Drive-In’s or Mom ‘n Pop theaters did, and re-packaging GRNDHOUSE for the over-caffinated ADD culture is, pardon my French, but “sum bulllshit if I eva smell’d sum …. she-it”

Viva Le Cinema!

Joe Lynch

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