Reviewed by Uncle Creepy
Starring Joe Knetter, Elske McCain, Scarlet Salem
Directed by Jason Stephenson
Distributed by Not for the Squeamish Productions
Back in the Eighties for a slasher film to succeed you needed to have three key elements in place — there had to be gore, there had to be tits, and there had to be a badass killer wearing some kind of crazy mask. Life for horror fans was good. Then in the Nineties things took a turn for the worse. There were still three key ingredients but now they were minimal violence, clothed sex scenes, and beautiful teens. What the fuck, man? How did this happen? Luckily in the 2000’s (is that what we’re calling this decade?) films like Wrong Turn 2 and Hatchet proved that it was okay to be over-the-top and fun again. While not as good as either of those flicks, Not for the Squeamish Productions’ short-film, You’re Next 3: Pajama Party Massacre packs a hell of a lot of absurdity for it’s short just over twenty-minute runtime.
The story is simple — two well endowed, dirty talking, sex-kittens (McCain and Scarlet) are having a sleep-over, eating ice cream, telling ghost stories, and getting naked. After all, that’s what chicks do when we’re not around, right? Anyways, things are humming along for our eye-candy when all of a sudden a hulking killer (Knetter) breaks into their apartment with a huge weapon, and I’m not talking about the one in his pants. From there it’s all sex, gore, and mayhem until the end credits.
Director Jason Stephenson (who despite his budget or lack thereof shows off an unusually good eye for the camera) and company knew what they were making with You’re Next 3: Pajama Party Massacre. These guys weren’t trying to reinvent the slasher genre or break any new ground. They just wanted to make a movie that gives its audience not only their fair share of gore, but plenty of reasons to hit the bathroom and rub one out really quick while nobody was looking.
On these levels this little flick succeeds in spades. The script penned by Knetter himself and Dustin LaValley is rife with sharp, tasteless, erotic humor, the music is sufficiently cheesy, and the acting is so bad at times that it’s nearly impossible not to laugh. Is the movie a winner? No. Is it at least technically proficient? Well, to a certain extent I guess. The only thing that really elevates it to the slightly above average level is its flagrant disregard for what is deemed acceptable nowadays, and the amount of fun you’ll have while watching it.
In terms of supplemental features there’s a boatload to be found here. We get two commentaries, two featurettes, interviews, outtakes, tons of stills, and even the inclusion of the painfully amateurish original duo of You’re Next movies, now remastered for our enjoyment. Not surprisingly, it’s Knetter who steals the show on these bits of extra goodness. The dude will drop his pants if the wind blows the wrong way, and his interview-from-the-bathroom is nothing short of bizarre genius. He’s the kind of guy you just wanna eat tacos, and go dancing with. What the fuck did I just write? Ummm … never mind.
You can safely put You’re Next 3: Pajama Party Massacre on your So Bad it’s Good lists. It’s a dirty little guilty pleasure that will have you laughing one second and diddling yourself the next. Don’t forget the tissues, man. This one will get you percolating.
3 out of 5
4 out of 5
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