Forest, The (DVD)
Starring Gary Kent, Tommi Barrett and Corky Pigeon
Directed by Don Jones
Distributed by Media Blasters
Many dangerous things await the unsuspecting who venture into unwatched wooded areas. One could be raped by bears, clowns, or Uwe Boll. Undead Native Americans could rise from the grave to gamble with the money of the living. Or madmen cannibals lurking in the forest could be haunted by the ghosts of his children and wife. Well, it wasn’t exactly as colorful a plot as the others, but could The Forest a hybrid gem that got lost sometime after the 1980s?
The Forest starts things off quickly with two bloody murders by a remarkably brazen loony. Perhaps the killer is new to this lifestyle, but it’s usually best not to run around right behind your target or wear a bright red hat in plain sight. Also, give your victim plenty of time to admire your shiny knife before plunging it into his/her gut. There’s no point in killing unless you know your customers are admiring your work.
As mentioned before, there is a ghost story associated with all killings. In a nutshell, John (Gary Kent) killed his wife because her vagina was an all-night parking garage, then ran off to the woods with his two young children.
These kids eventually become sick and kill themselves … yup, they do themselves in because they got a cold. After this brilliant move, these tykes become ghosts who more or less annoy their father by tipping off his potential meals to his presence.
There are more characters involved, but by the time the film wraps up, you won’t know them by their names but by their hairstyles and inability to deliver lines of dialogue with more emotion than a couple of planks of wood. Honestly, it’s quite challenging to figure out why this movie is even worth spending time with on the DVD player.
There is never a sense of fear, isolation, or even sorrow for the pathetic characters, even when they are unknowingly eating a loved one. The Forest is the perfect example of how not to act while seeing ghosts, being chased by a killer or breaking your leg.
For every mark The Forest misses as a movie, the DVD almost makes up for it with its special features. The two commentary tracks were a surprise. When it comes to films that haven’t seen the light of day in years, it’s astounding if they even get one special feature, let alone two commentaries, a trailer, a photo gallery, and interviews.
That’s a lot of hootch, but not everything packs the kind of quality one would expect. The cast and crew interviews are shot with what looks like a camcorder and sport the same quality sound: shitty. The trailer and photo gallery are decent for what they are, but nothing can touch two separate audio tracks.
These could have been combined technically, as significant silent gaps are present throughout the feature. Both feature the film’s director, Don Jones, but his guests are different for each. Problems arise intermittently as the commentators pause or rarely offer anything of value to contribute. What the audience can hear a lot of is how much of the cast haven’t done anything since the film. Hmmmm, why could that be?
The Forest has been called a few things, from slasher to psychological horror. Don’t be fooled, though. This direct-to-VHS turned silver screen gracer is too light on the body count to be a real slasher and far too dumb to stimulate any mental terror.
Special Features:
Commentary with director Don Jones and DP Stuart Asbjornsen
Commentary with director Don Jones and actor Gary Kent
Promo Trailer
Photo Gallery
Cast & Crew Interviews
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The Forest (2007)
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Special Features
Categorized: Reviews
