Reviewed by Uncle Creepy
Starring Timothy Muskatell, Noah Segan, Andrea Rueda, Ezra Buzzington
Directed by Chad Ferrin
Distributed by Breaking Glass Pictures
Anyone who is familiar with director Chad Ferrin’s work (The Ghouls, Easter Bunny, Kill! Kill!) can attest to one simple fact … he has a knack for making the viewers of his movies feel both dirty and extremely uncomfortable. That’s why we dig this dude. He has giant brass balls, and his latest film Someone’s Knocking at the Door is home to the cock that fits that giant set. Literally. Before we get into all that, though, how about a quick plot crunch?
It’s the weekend, and six college friends, headed up by indie favorite Noah Segan (Dead Girl, Cabin Fever 2: Spring Fever), get together to do what friends do — get stoned and fuck. Of course the place that they pick to do so in leaves a lot to be desired … a former mental hospital! Why not, right? While doing their thing, our protagonists come across some old files and psychiatric session tapes belonging to the establishment’s two most dangerous serial killers, John and Wilma Hopper (the always incredible Ezra Buzzington and Elina Madison), who were infamous for raping their victims to death with their abnormally large sex organs. Example — the evil John is sporting a fifteen-inch cock with a circumference of four inches around. Now that’s a lethal weapon if we’ve ever heard of one.
Once these long forgotten forces have been stirred up, our resident ne’er-do-wells find themselves dropping like flies in the most hilariously heinous ways imaginable. Yet, things aren’t exactly so black and white as they seem. There are other things happening in Someone’s Knocking at the Door that are likely to fuck with a lot more than just your mind.
Simply put, in typical Chad Ferrin fashion this movie is absolutely deranged and for the weak at heart or stomach pretty hard to watch. Ferrin is an obvious fan of over-the-top Seventies cinema where rules and boundaries didn’t mean a goddamn thing, and this, just like his previous films, is a love letter written endearingly in shit, blood, and cum. There’s little doubt people are either going to love this flick or curse the day they ever heard of it. Do you have the gumption to figure out which camp you’re in?
Once you’re done with all the lunacy to be found here, there’s also a host of special features for you to dig on. Things kick off with two commentary tracks, and both are, as you would expect, pretty friggin’ nutty. Dig below to see who takes part in which. Honestly? You can’t go wrong with either. From there we get a forty-minute making-of doc that is home to some interesting looks at the film’s over-the-top F/X work and more. This one runs just a bit too long but is still fun to check out. Next up is the Taldon Drug Test Subject 1 short film, which was excerpted in the film, now on display in its entirety; and finally we get a battery of deleted and extended scenes, a music video for the song “Say It” by Andrew Lynch that was directed by star Noah Segan, and things are capped off with a poster and trailer gallery. Just like the film’s villain … this disc is packing!
Someone’s Knocking at the Door is the perfect way to ruin the weekend for someone who appreciates glossy, high profile Hollywood fare. If you have such friends, please sit them down and watch them suffer. Be warned, however, as jaded as we are sure that you are … you’re gonna need a shower after this wonderfully sleazy boatload of sick!
4 out of 5
4 out of 5