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The River Does Well But Falls Short





ABC's "The River" premiered last night to curious audiences, and we've got the word on whether it sank or swam. Read on for the latest details on your terror tube!

According to The Hollywood Reporter the two-hour premiere of ABC's "The River," which, while soft in its returns and declining every half hour, still topped last season's comparable mid-season time slot entry, "Off The Map."

"The River" pulled in a 2.4 among adults 18-49, with a 2.5 at 9:00 p.m. and a 2.2 at 10:00 p.m.., and gave the network its strongest showing in the time slot since the fall finale of "Dancing With the Stars." ABC averaged a 2.4 among 18-49-ers for the night and 7.6 million viewers.

"The River" stars Bruce Greenwood, Leslie Hope, and Joe Anderson. Jeff Galfer and Thomas Kretschmann co-star in the ABC Studios television project produced by Oren Peli and his Paranormal Activity franchise collaborators Jason Blum and Steven Schneider. The pilot episode was directed by Jaume Collet-Serra (The Orphan, House of Wax).

Synopsis
Famed explorer Dr. Emmet Cole (Greenwood) went looking for magic deep in the uncharted Amazon and never returned. The shocking truth about his disappearance is out there, somewhere, just waiting to be discovered. To the millions of kids who grew up watching his nature show, Dr. Cole was a hero. To his own son, Lincoln (Anderson), he was more of an enigma. Now, six months after he vanished, Lincoln is finally ready to bury the past when Dr. Cole's emergency beacon suddenly goes off. At the urging of his mother, Tess (Hope), Lincoln reluctantly joins her on a search for his father. To fund the rescue, they agree to let Dr. Cole's cagey ex-producer, Clark (Paul Blackthorne), film the mission documentary-style. The mixed crew of old friends and new acquaintances includes the sexy and resourceful Lena (Eloise Mumford), loyal mechanic Emilio (Daniel Zacapa), and lethal bodyguard Captain Kurt Brynildson (Kretschmann).

The River Does Well But Falls Short

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Source: The Hollywood Reporter

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Finally got around to watching the premiere. I turned it off and deleted it about 2/3 through the 2-hour stretch. What a piece of crap. I was seriously excited for this, but it fails on all counts: acting, dialog, storytelling, atmosphere, and an utter failure to exploit the found footage format in any meaningful way. I mean, the whole "Once for no, twice for yes!" thing was so ridiculous it was laughable. Really, that's how she's going to act in that situation? Sorry, found footage needs to feel authentic, believable, and intimate. This felt scripted, contrived, and uninspired.


Submitted by hegemon13 on Thu, 02/16/2012 - 11:20am.
kiddcapone's picture

The River sank like a rock....luckily there was 49 underwater cameras there to film it's complete descent from top to the bottom.


Submitted by kiddcapone on Wed, 02/08/2012 - 5:16pm.

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