CRUEL JAWS Blu-ray Review – Jaws 5, Viewers 0
Starring David Luther, George Barnes, Jr., Scott Silveria, Kristen Urso
Directed by Bruno Mattei (as William Snyder)
Distributed by Severin Films
Bruno Mattei made a name from himself by liberally cribbing from numerous pop culture cinema staples and passing them off as his own “inspired” works. Robowar (1988) is a poor Predator (1987) clone. Shocking Dark, also known as Terminator 2 – before there was an actual T2 (1991) – is a marinara mash-up of James Cameron’s Aliens (1986) and Terminator (1984). Hell of the Living Dead (1980) is a hatchet job of Dawn of the Dead (1978), complete with Goblin score (not that they actually composed anything original for Mattei’s film). In all of these cases it is clear to anyone who has watched popular American action and horror movies exactly what Mattei is doing – but he did so using his own footage.
The same can’t be said of Cruel Jaws (1995) – marketed as Jaws 5 in some territories – because this is where Mattei brazenly pushed the copyright infringement envelope to the point Universal stepped in and sued. Utilizing footage from Jaws (1975) and Jaws 2 (1978), as well as other awful Italian shark pictures such as Deep Blood (1989) and Great White (1981), Mattei assembled a Frankenstein’s fish of abysmal aquatic adventures to deliver this sloppy slice of cinematic chum. “Inept” doesn’t come close to describing this bottom-of-the-barrel timewaster, but it’s the first word that comes to mind.
Hampton Bay is about to celebrate the town’s annual Regatta when a killer shark begins eating the locals. The mayor wants the celebration to continue without incident, of course. Meanwhile, the owner of a Sea World-type amusement park – who looks like Hulk Hogan without any of the muscle – is being bullied by mobsters to give up his property so a local businessman can capitalize on the location. Somehow, these stories and a few others culminate in an effort to kill the shark and save the town’s big event.
Whew, boy… where do you even begin? The mobster angle is pulled directly from the Jaws novel. The mayor is a thinly veiled facsimile of Mayor Vaughn (Murray Hamilton). The underwater park is aping from Jaws 3-D (1983). Oddly enough, there are even lines of dialogue taken almost verbatim from Jurassic Park (1993). The shots from Jaws and Jaws 2 Mattei uses are purely for establishment and feel awfully pointless given their brevity. Numerous day-for-night scenes look like someone slapped a filter over a brightly-lit shot. There’s also a disturbing amount of footage using what appears to be a shark toy in an aquarium, mostly notably used during the big climax.
Speaking of the shark, the film clearly states a tiger shark is responsible for the killings. This after the film has already shown footage of a Great White, Mako, Tiger, and other assorted sharks. I didn’t go into this expecting consistency but, geez… Most of the shark footage is stock or repurposed but the stuff done by the Italian FX team looks like someone constructed a giant papier-mâché head and tossed it in the water.
Thanks to the black magic of Mattei’s editing, every actor in here that doesn’t share a frame seems like they’re in a different movie – and that’s because some of them are. I can appreciate a good/bad film when the filmmakers show effort and care was put into the process; this, however, is nothing but pure laziness every grueling minute. The only thing “cruel” about this picture is watching it.
The 1.85:1 1080p image is touted as being “remastered” though given the multitude of sources and the already shoddy nature of Mattei’s lensing let’s say this is likely the best Cruel Jaws can and should look – and it honestly looks awful. Even setting aside the issues that arise from stealing footage and color timing it to fit within Mattei’s vision, whatever footage he shot looks to have been kept in poor condition. Emulsion scratches are abundant and the picture looks like a bad VHS dub at times. There wasn’t a single shot that made me think “yes, this is HD quality”. I don’t fault Severin for any of this and the work they’ve done to “polish a turd” is commendable. I would imagine most viewers have expectations in check, as they should be. Word on the ‘net is that Mattei’s cut looks better than the Snyder cut but I wasn’t willing to watch both for verification.
An English DTS-HD MA 2.0 delivers the audio and it’s more competent than the video quality, which is damning with faint praise. Dialogue sounds better than expected for an Italian film. The score is all over the damn place, though; zero consistency to be heard. I was astounded to hear, of all things, the Star Wars fanfare music ripped off multiple times. In a shark movie. Why? Subtitles are available in English.
Special Features:
- NEW REMASTER OF THE FULLY UNCUT VERSION OF THE FILM
- The Snyder Cut – Unreleased Japanese Extended Cut
- The Great White Way – A Study in Sharksploitation with Rebekah McKendry
- These Things Got Made! – Interview with Actor Jay Colligan
- Trailer
- Exclusive Slipcover
- REGION-A “LOCKED”
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Cruel Jaws
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Special Features
Summary
Releasing this as Jaws 5 in some territories was fitting because that series was all about diminishing returns and I can safely say Jaws 4: The Revenge (1987) looks like a masterpiece next to this. Kudos to Severin for releasing such schlock with all their usual bells & whistles but this one did nothing for me. Also, kudos to whomever gets the logline pun I stole from a proposed title to Jaws 3-D.
