SHOCKING DARK Blu-ray Review – Two Servings of James Cameron Covered in Marinara and Extra Cheese
Anthony Arrigo
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Starring Haven Tyler, Cristopher Ahrens, Geretta Geretta, Dominica Coulson
Directed by Bruno Mattei (as Vincent Dawn)
Distributed by Severin Films
Before James Cameron made an actual Terminator 2 in 1990, international audiences were being treated to yet another fugazi sequel courtesy of the Italians; this one being director Bruno Mattei’s Terminator 2 (1989), a.k.a. Shocking Dark a.k.a. what you get when a crazy son of a bitch director mashes up The Terminator (1984) with Aliens (1986) and never tries to hide the fact he’s liberally ripping off both. Shocking Dark is a maelstrom of masturbatory fantasy, culled from the mind of a 14-year-old boy and brought to low-budget life by a titan of Italian schlock. Maybe titan is overselling Mattei’s abilities a bit but the man partially responsible for the madness that is Zombi 3 (1988) injected all of his insanity juice into this portmanteau feature and the result is a film of legendarily ludicrous proportions. If the T-800 and a xenomorph made a baby, and that baby was flushed down the toilet but somehow managed to survive in the sewers, eating the remnants out of Chef Boyardee cans and drinking toxic waste, the resulting mass would be Shocking Dark.
Venice has become off-limits due to a toxic cloud that has enveloped the city. Creatures roam the underground tunnels, attacking workers and disrupting the research of the Tubular Corporation. A squad of roughneck soldiers, commanded by Samuel Fuller (Cristopher Ahrens), are enlisted to stop the rubber-frog-beast uprising. The makeup of the unit is pretty much identical to Aliens, right down to their own version of Vasquez (Jenette Goldstein), here known as Koster (Geretta Geretta), and, of course, a Ripley, here called Sara (Haven Tyler). Together, they are known as Megaforce – apparently; the name doesn’t get thrown around much. Not long after entering the subterranean depths the group comes across people trapped in cocoons. Then, they meet a young girl named Newt, er, Samantha (Dominica Coulson), who has survived all alone and knows these corridors like the back of her clearly-twentysomething hand. Then, the group is caught up in a massive firefight after their handheld tracking device picks up the creatures coming straight for them. What’s that, only 5 meters away? But that’s impossible – they’d have to be in the room!
We’ve all seen this movie before.
But wait, Samuel got injured in the big fight and, hey, what’s he hiding on his arm? It’s his cybernetic endoskeleton! Now, the group not only has to contend with store brand Cthulhu monsters running about, but now Samuel goes full Ah-nold mode, Sara has to switch from being Ripley to channeling her inner Sarah Connor, and suddenly the group is caught in a fantasy story I envisioned during a boring lecture from my high school geometry teacher. Samuel’s main job is to protect the interests of Tubular Corporation because – shocking spoiler! – they’re evil shitbags. Although, the company is due some credit for making an informative video that literally spells out their entire nefarious plan to stock holders. No joke.
If nothing written above has convinced you to go out and buy this movie immediately then I have failed at properly expressing just how batshit crazy this thing is from start to finish. It’s a pulsing genre mashup that perfectly encapsulates the B-movie madness the Italians were masters at purveying. Mattei swings for the fences and packs in as much production value as possible, ensuring there is little fat on this sleek, sleazy beast. Truthfully, viewers have little time to comprehend how ridiculous the film is because they’re too busy being besieged by one surreal scene after the next. I’ve seen homages in films, and I’ve seen films that were heavily inspired by others, but Shocking Dark is practically a remake of Aliens before ditching the finale to dovetail into The Terminator. It makes for a weird and awesome viewing experience. Some repertory theater in L.A. needs to run a triple bill; now that would make for one helluva night.
As a fan of all things involving monsters, Severin’s cover art for Shocking Dark got me excited because the slimy sewer beast on the front looks awesome, but this is, sadly, another case where the artwork is fantasy while reality brings forth the true frog prince. Don’t expect to see anything but men in gooey rubber suits menacing the cast, but there’s a charm to the effort that made me love these ugly suckers. Mattei doesn’t hold them back for the finale, either; these things are the xenomorphs of the film and they are shown often and, perhaps unwisely, in good lighting. Shocking Dark embraces its campy nature and delivers the goods on a budget that probably wouldn’t cover the cost of craft service for either of its “parent” films, and while the quality is nowhere the top Mattei’s film is, in some ways, every bit as entertaining.
Of the three recent Italian schlock films Severin recently released, Shocking Dark looks the best, with a 1.78:1 1080p image that is shockingly sharp and detailed. Minute facial features and clothing textures have a real life quality to them, like you could reach through the screen and feel every ridge and rivet. Colors are vibrant and healthy, with the yellows of the hazmat team suits looking incredibly vivid. Film grain is moderate throughout – smooth and not overly processed. Blue and red lighting gels are used frequently, bathing the picture in Bava-esque hues. The second half looks a bit rougher, with grain becoming more variable and white flecks appearing on the screen with some frequency. Still, the overall image quality here is surprising and I was more than satisfied with Severin’s presentation.
Audio comes in five flavors – English, Italian, Spanish, German, and Chinese, each given the same DTS-HD MA 2.0 mono track. There is a subtle but persistent hissing heard in the background throughout. Dialogue comes through loud and clear, but sound effects lack punch; there is little impact to some bigger moments because of this. Slight crackling is heard in a few spots. It’s a thin track overall, lacking in dynamics and power. Even composer score is a fairly generic effort. Subtitles are available in English.
Terminator in Venice – Interview with Co-Director/Co-Screenwriter Claudio Fragasso and Co-Screenwriter Rossella Drudi – Capping off the epic three-part interview these two provided for Severin’s trio of trash, Fragasso and Drudi candidly discuss how this trashterpiece came together.
Once Upon a Time in Italy – Interview with Actress Geretta Geretta – The actress best known for her work in Lamberto Bava’s Demons (1985) offers up a breezy chat about her short-but-memorable film career in Italy’s horror scene.
Alternate Italian titles, as Terminator 2, and a trailer are the remainder of the extras.
Special Features:
- BRAND NEW 2K REMASTER OF THE FILM
- Terminator in Venice – An Interview with Co-Director / Co-Screenwriters Claudio Fragasso and Co-Screenwriter Rossella Drudi
- Once Upon A Time in Italy – An Interview With Actress Geretta Geretta
- Alternate Italian Titles
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Shocking Dark
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Special Features
Summary
If slimy schlock is your lifeblood, then tap that vein and let Uncle Bruno’s blend of ’80s action seep into your system and melt your mind. Severin presents the first-ever release for this roaring rip-off with great a/v quality and the promise of one damn fun time getting dunked into this fondue pot of toxic cheese.
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