Biologists Have Created Zombie Cells So Buy Your Undead Survival Kits Now!
Todd Rigney
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I’m not a scientist (I’m sure that’s painfully obvious), but I’ve consumed enough undead-related material to know that when someone creates anything that relates to zombies, it never ends well. Maybe if I had a degree in biology, my brain wouldn’t immediately assume that the world doesn’t need anything called “zombie cells,” even if this experiment resides exclusively in a lab. I’ve got a machete and several cans of Progresso soup so I think I’m ready for the inevitable apocalypse.
According to The Huffington Post, scientists have successfully created dead “zombie” cells that “perform many functions better than the original cells did when alive.” In short, animal cells are covered with silica that essentially creates an exact replica of the creature in question. This experiment sounds nifty and utterly terrifying at the same time.
Lead researcher Bryan Kaehr, who was obviously excited about the results, said that “the zombie cells bridge chemistry and biology to create forms that not only near-perfectly resemble their past selves, but can do future work.” Yikes!
So what’s the endgame? What do these mad scientists biologists hope to achieve by creating zombie cells in Petri dishes? Giant Freakin Robot explains that the “research is to advance the study of reusable fossils that could be used as fuel cells… The zombie cells could also be used for decontamination and sensor technology and commercial manufacturing.”
And while these sound like completely legitimate purposes, one can’t help but wonder what would happen if these zombie cells were stolen from the lab and used for nefarious purposes by a group of deranged madmen with creepy moustaches and penchants for maniacal laughter. For crying out loud, we already have zombie ants — what’s next?
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2irXpAMBHkE&w=800&h=450]
Categorized:News
