Infected (DVD)
Matt Boiselle
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Starring Luke Hobson, Nicky Paul Barton, David Wayman
Directed by Andrew Gilbert
Distributed by Image Entertainment
I want you all to follow the following recipe for the ULTIMATE zombie pic (sarcasm included at no extra charge) – take any group of oblivious boobs, and set them against the backdrop of a cataclysmic undead outbreak – the zombies can either be track stars or slow, shambling shufflers. In this case, we’ll use track stars to help enhance the horror factor – toss in a little gore and VOILA! Assembly-line product, and director Andrew Gilbert’s Infected is unfortunately no exception to the rule.
Aside from an overly kick-ass piece of cover art, there really isn’t a whole lot to speak of on this cookie-cutter retread of so many flesh-munching projects that have wandered down the path of death before it, and not to take anything away from Gilbert’s directorial style, but I could just as easily flip my channel to Chiller or SyFy and pick up on any matinee, and receive the same display as when I pushed the play button here. The movie follows a bunch of young British chaps who like to congregate, whine about their love lives, and swill the suds. As their hormones and cravings for more booze take over, they all head out to a local nightclub and resume the festivities, completely unaware of the danger that is lurking right outside the doors.
Led by Adam (Hobson), he and his pals finally manage to receive a little taste of the madness when the club is infiltrated by a few of the rampaging infected, and their choices immediately turn to “flee with reckless abandon” – and for the most part, aside from the blueprinted schematics of zombie-dom, their game of hide and seek was mildly entertaining, and they eventually find themselves holed up in a makeshift emergency center, waiting the crisis out until a cure can be found…wow, I just sounded like the type on EVERY back cover of a zombie DVD…am I getting repetitious in my statement of misery? Anyway, the situation becomes more muddled with the inclusion of a maladjusted military task force sent in to sweep and clear. Their methods are sloppy, and they apparently couldn’t contain an assembly of drunk British youths better than a horde of stampeding undead killers…but that’s just my take.
I’ll continue to support the arts no matter what, but the tediousness of trying to differentiate between THIS zombie movie and THAT zombie movie can be trying from time to time, and I can only blame myself for hoping “maybe this one will be different” – perhaps a kick in the nuts would be a nice change as well. I’ll wish Mr. Gilbert the best with all of his future projects, as there are glimpses of brilliance in this production, but the overwhelming sense of “been there, watched that” is ripe and ready, and plagues this movie like a runaway case of scabies.
Overall, I’ll give a couple of positive points for the visuals, but the 120 minute runtime was completely unnecessary, and simply adds to the negative. In closing, I’ll advise this: pick up ANY OTHER zombie production in your favorite video store, or on Netflix, or Amazon, or from that creepy dude down the street selling bootlegs that runs when the cops round the corner, and I’m sure you’ll come to the same conclusion: this infection is like all of the others – better left in quarantine.
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Film
Categorized:Reviews
