Your shopping ain’t done! The following discs hit stores on December 26th, 2006…
Now I’ve met and dated some chicks with intimacy issues, but Helen’s got it worse than any of them (to date). Not only does she have problems getting close to men, but when she finally does her private parts devour them alive and leave her with an aching thirst for more blood. What’s a girl to do? Why, become a prostitute, of course, and would you be surprised to find out that death and horror follow her everywhere she goes? I wouldn’t be… Buy it here!
A collection of three films about, you guessed it, Aztec mummies; the perfect gift for that friend or relative who is just impossible to buy for. La Momia Azteca is about a doctor who learns that his fiancée is actually the reincarnation of an Aztec maiden and tries to find out where all their treasures are hidden through here. In La Maldición de la momia azteca, an evil doctor continues to pursue the girl to try and squeeze the secrets out of here. La Momia azteca contra el robot humano finds the evil doctor building a robot (of course!) to break into the Aztec tomb to get the treasures and beat up the resident mummy. Buy it here!
Directed by Ariel Vromen
Marisa Tomei stars as the title character, a loving mother with a great life; good husband, nice kids, and a safe and quiet neighborhood. But her worries about everyday dangers begin to manifest themselves into tragic events. Fearing she’s going insane, she seeks psychiatric help which, as usual, only makes the problem worse. I doubt this one’s going to be too gripping, but to some Ms. Tomei is very easy on the eyes so at least we’ll get to see her screaming a lot I’m sure. Buy it here!
Dark Remains (2005)
Directed by Brian Avenet-Bradley
Brian’s latest thriller’s actually been done for a while now (check out my old review of it right here). I’m not sure why it took Monarch so long to get it on DVD but I’m glad you’ll all get a chance to see it. The story is about a couple that lost their daughter due to a brutal home invasion years earlier. Still trying to heal from the scars the two take a trip to a remote cabin, and the wife finally begins to find a renewed passion for photography. Unfortunately her inspirational subject is a local abandoned prison that’s teeming with a all sorts of bad vibes. Creepy stuff! Buy it here!
If you didn’t head out to theaters to see this when it was out, shame one you. I hope you got nothing but coal for gifts, I truly do. Perhaps you can make up for it by getting the best horror film of the year on DVD. Perhaps. The story is simple; a group of female cave divers head out explore a new underground cave as a way of re-connecting. Very bad things happens. Get the disc, turn out the lights, crank your surround sound and prepared to be scare. Check out Creepy’s DVD review of it for more! Buy it here!
Is it truly the new sound of terror, as the tagline says, or just a crappy rat-themed horror movie? Foywonder believed it to be mostly the latter in his review, but really only you can make that call. It’s actually a sequel to the 2001 Revenge of the Rats, just so you’re aware, but that doesn’t make it suck any less. Genetically altered rats are genetically altered rats no matter what language it’s in, so I’m sure the English-dubbed German acting won’t bother you, either. Buy it here!
FYI, the title is the Persian word for Satan, which makes sense in this film about, well, Satanic stuff. Three youths are thrown out of a Paris nightclub on Christmas Eve and invited back to some girls’ countryside home to continue their night of debauchery. They meet a man named Joseph there, and he is beyond odd, with some less-than-holy plans for the group. Weird, weird shit goes down. Perhaps it will make more sense if you just read my DVD review of it, though somehow I doubt it. Buy it here!
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