Blood Punch (2015)

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Blood PunchStarring Milo Cawthorne, Olivia Tennet, Ari Boyland

Directed by Madellaine Paxson


Stephen King, H.P. Lovecraft, Edgar Allan Poe – three of the most revered and highly regarded horror writers of their time. Their works have spanned time and chilled spines to a sub-zero level – some of their penned pieces have been turned to film, and they’ve been thought of as some seriously creative (albeit demented) minds. What I’m getting at is these three cut their teeth in horror and perfected their art to a level that has ultimately reached the stratosphere.

Now I could go on and toss names at you all day, but when you think in terms of the innovatory mind, could you potentially see a director and writer on a project whose roots began in kid’s programming? Put up your dukes cause it’s time for the Blood Punch.

First into the ring is director Madellaine Paxson. This being her maiden directorial voyage, and with the ultimately terrifying resume (sarcasm) behind her in a writer’s position, she’s worked on such shows as the Disney Channel’s “Kim Possible” and the “Power Rangers.” Her ringside assistant is writer Eddie Guzelian, whose past efforts have included “Winnie the Pooh” and “Peter Rabbit.” I don’t know about your fear tolerance, but the mere names make me not want to close my eyes at night, and together the two have collaborated to bring a most twisted love story/horror/thriller right to our doorsteps.

Blood Punch follows a hopelessly recovering meth addict named Milton (Cawthorne), whose latest escapades have involved him waking up in a bathroom and wondering how he managed to videotape himself cutting off his fingers the night before; yet, this morning, all of his digits are still intact… odd to say the least. In one of his meetings we’re introduced to the yang to Milton’s yin: Her name is Skyler (Tennet), and while the group is attending these help sessions to hopefully grasp hold of sobriety, she’s there to search for a primo meth-cooker – anyone know Walter White’s phone number?

Milton inevitably gives in to Skylar’s advances and aids her in the quest for a cooked batch of ice that will provide quite the hefty payday. So it’s off to the woods, and in a secluded cabin the scene is set… oh wait, did I mention Skylar’s completely dangerous and unstable boyfriend, Russell (Boyland), who’s in charge of this whole operation? Yeah, sorry for omitting that one. Ah well, no matter – things should go smoothly here, right?

In Russell’s infinite stupidity, he manages to set off an old Indian curse with his actions, and the same day is repeated over and over again, just think of a blacker comedy level of Groundhog Day. Now, this isn’t horror by any stretch, but it’s thrilling, and an ample dose of some very dark comedy makes this film a very fun time to partake in. Cawthorne is a more nervous version of Jesse Eisenberg, while Olivia Tennet shines as the chain-smoking, mouth-like-a-trucker femme fatale, and Boyland absolutely steals the scenes as the uber-douche boyfriend, totally bypassing the exit ramp for “safe performance” and heading straight for “overblown madness.”

The never-ending twists and repeated turns will entertain, and while some might not dig the number of do-overs in the movie, it’s all for the completed project, and for a couple of people who wrote for kids’ shows, they’ve definitely crossed the velvet rope. I can only wait with bated breath to see what other morsels of madness they manage to create in the future. Believe me when I tell you: Blood Punch is a knockout.

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