B-Sides: Bikini Island Is Picture Perfect

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With the annual Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue hitting shelves this past week, it seems as good a time as any for one of the many musical contributions from the 1991 swimsuit slasher Bikini Island. A B-Sides you can enjoy even with the sound off.

Bikini Island has a bit of an interesting pedigree in that it was produced in part by the swimsuit company Ujena, which also published the magazine Swimwear Illustrated to help promote its products. What better way to promote your swimsuits and your swimsuit magazine than with a direct-to-video thriller about swimsuit models, photographers, and the rest of the crew on a swimsuit magazine shoot being killed off one-by-one?

Bikini Island is quite the odd duck of a movie. Despite its R rating and the premise, there’s not much gore and surprisingly little T&A. It’s not quite a slasher flick, nor is a comedy, but quite a few people die and often so preposterously it’s hard to fathom much of it wasn’t meant to elicit laughs. This movie features a scene where a peeping tom dies with a sinister grin on his face after getting bonked on his head with a large rock the same you’d see a coconut bounce off someone’s head on “Gilligan’s Island.”

It should come as absolutely no surprise to anyone to hear that this film is loaded to the gills with montages of beautiful women in bikinis posing for the camera, every last one of which is set to a song entitled “Picture Perfect” that is the very epitome of a B-Side. Like I stated at the outset, you can always turn off the audio to enjoy this video. Although, if you do so, you might be momentarily confused when a brief period of creepy leering on the part of one of the film’s red herrings interrupts the song.

bsides - B-Sides: Bikini Island Is Picture Perfect

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Written by Steve Barton

You're such an inspiration for the ways that I will never, ever choose to be.


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