Directed by Ulli Lommel
Distributed by Lionsgate
Let’s face it: Ulli Lommel is a horrible filmmaker. Over the past few years we’ve seen DVD after DVD roll out and not one manages to actually be anything more than a shitfest. Lommel has traded in plot, character development, and conflict for … nothing. His projects are a combination of confusing camera angles, extreme close-ups, rape and the need to rip off whatever is popular in our genre at the time. Oh, and to do it all as quickly and cheaply as possible.
The only factor involved that sells these things has to be the DVD box art. Even the most knowledgeable of horror fans may pick up one of these at the store and say, “Hey! This looks cool,” only to return home and end up crying in a corner. Now that Lionsgate has removed Ulli’s name from the front of the box, I’m sure that’s an even stronger possibility. They’re adapting!
None of the many features from Lommel’s cannon have ever been justly represented by the the images Lionsgate slaps on the case. It’s a sad day in Hell when one photoshopped image manages to take more talent than an entire 90-minute motion picture. What the fuck?!
What, exactly, is the point of watching a movie where you’re shown the dead victims before they actually bite it? Is building up suspense a thing of the past? That kind of storytelling didn’t help out House of the Dead, but then again Boll’s work looks like solid gold next to Lommel’s on every level. Uwe Bool looks like a saint in comparison because he also lacks the strange rape fetish that Lommel has.
Oh, you didn’t expect him to stray far from his favorite subject did you? Yes, Lommel seems to be able to fit in rape, or at least talk about rape, into many of his projects. This must be what he considers “being edgy”. There’s something disturbing going on in this guy’s mind.
Please …. PLEASE stay far far away from anything with Ulli Lommel’s name on it. Sitting through a movie from this man is like contracting mental herpes. Sometime in the future you’ll be sitting there and suddenly remember bits about a Lommel feature, and there will be much suffering. You won’t even want to have sex, and if someone finds out you’ve seen his films they won’t want to have sex with you either. Believe me, I know.
Special Features
FEATURES
1/2 out of 5
Avoid discussing Borderline Cult in the Dread Central forums!