The nature and unpredictability of man is scary enough in its own right, especially when it comes to horror movies. Adding some psychotic animal to the mix that doesn’t have the capacity to reason, bargain, or feel any mercy for its potential victims is quite terrifying when you look at the realistic scenario as animal attacks are obviously a very real thing.
Could you imagine actually coming face to slimy face with a snake such as the one from Anaconda?
Movies that focus on killer animals in the horror genre are split down the middle between super cheesy or really horrifying. There doesn’t really seem to be an in-between in so-called “creature features” as you’re either watching a shark movie on a ridiculous level such as Sharknado or a flick such as JAWS that actually made you afraid of the ocean. So, let’s talk about six of the scariest animals in horror films that actually scared the crap out of us.
Lucifer, erm… excuse me, Church the cat wasn’t always a demonic fuzzball from Hell. The pet owned by Ellie Creed in King’s Pet Sematary was ultimately killed by that damn road and one of the deadly trucks that plows through every so often. Her father, Louis, and neighbor Judd, who don’t want the little girl to face any grief, bury the feline up in Pet Sematary, a place where the dead seemingly come back once more; however, they aren’t the same as they once were as the burial grounds had rotted.
Church comes back from the dead a nasty little shit indeed. The once docile British Shorthair stunk of death, which forced the family to throw him out quite often. However, the feline would always find a way back in. He became quite aggressive towards Louis in particular and loved to leave little “presents” for him around the house. Sometimes, cats do this to show affection, but we all know there’s nothing quite normal about Mr. Churchill over here.
Unfortunately, there aren’t a ton of video clips of the little bugger out there, so here’s The Ramones’ video featuring the devil cat, Zelda, and King himself. I think we can deal with that.
Another one of King’s insane creations from the animal kingdom makes number five. Old Yellar gone batshit crazy, Cujo. Much like Church, Cujo was initially a mild-mannered St. Bernard. That is, until a wild rabbit chase sealed the poor pup’s fate with a rabid bunny biting the canine, infecting him with the maddening disease. Cujo eventually found his way home and violently kills a few of his neighbors. Awesome, now we have a gargantuan rabid dog that has a taste for blood and the owners are nowhere around. Gorgeous.
Donna and her son, Tad, who live next to the canine’s owners, are caught off guard by Cujo who stumbled upon them in the most inconvenient time of her vehicle taking a mighty dump on her – damn good for nothing Pintos. Cujo corners Donna and her young son while they barricade themselves in her broken car, all the while the dog is going nuts trying to break in. Cujo is absolutely terrifying in the aspect of news reports we hear every so often of man’s best friend turning on their owners or severely injuring neighbors. Of course, circumstances vary and it’s usually a humanoid who provokes said attacks. However, if you ever come across a rabid animal such as this, I pray you don’t own a Ford Pinto and Dee Wallace is hanging around nearby. Otherwise, you’re probably screwed.
Hard to believe underneath this cute as a button monkey is a jealous, homicidal bitch. But alas, athlete turned quadriplegic Allen has his hands full with his helper monkey Ella. The monkey, who had endured some questionable experiments involving injecting her with human brain tissue, was provided to Allen to help cope with his unfortunate accident that has left him learning to deal with his disability. Things are pretty darling at first between the two, but as the pair seem to spend more time with each other, Ella becomes over-protective of the handicapped Allen and seems to be able to tap into his mind, becoming a telepathic vessel harnessing his inner rage over his present circumstances. That’s when the monkey shit really hits the fan.
Ella’s rage turns into a deadly stint of jealousy. She begins killing off Allen’s family, friends, and definitely has the stink-eye for Allen’s new girlfriend. The face-off between Allen and Ella (shown below) when he finally gains some control over his furry caretaker is about as ridicules as they come. I laugh my ass off every single time. Aside from that laughable exchange, the thought of your service animal harnessing a deadly instinct for everyone around you is kinda horrifying.
Can you even fathom the thought of this ever happening? The ratio of birds to humans would have us not only crapping our pants, but utterly screwed.
The film provided no rhyme or reason for the birds of Bodega Bay’s sudden killer instinct to attack all the humans. But I’m fairly certain that was the intention, as the things we don’t understand invoke a heightened amount of fear in us all. The waves of bird attacks become more violent as the film progresses, and the fear and tension inside the small community evolve into panic, such as in the restaurant scene of the film after one extremely horrendous bird attack invokes a maddening accusation against our main protagonist, Melanie (Tippi Hendren). One of the overly anxious locals trying to make sense of the situation, I suppose, places blame on the visiting guest from the city, as the attacks seemed to coincide with her arrival. I think she’s just a fucking nut altogether. My theory for said exchange, however, may hold a deeper meaning for the film, as I tend to over-analyze the shit out of everything. The tense moment in the diner could hold a comparison as humans in panic mode tend to turn on each other while animals (birds in this case), of different species even, coordinate and work together in a pretty impressive fashion among chaos… even if the purpose is to kill the people of the town.
This movie will give anyone with the mildest fear of spiders the extreme skeevies. All aboard the train to NOPEville with the spiders of Arachnophobia, pushing in at number deux. The movie centers on the accidental arrival of an extremely aggressive and venomous spider from the Amazon, who of course breeds with a domesticated female, which but of course, ends up spawning an army of eight-legged lethal monsters. Jeff Daniels and John Goodman to the rescue! I would just set that whole town on fire.
Was there really anyone expecting anyone other than Bruce the shark to hit the top spot here? Bueller? Bueller? I thought not. No other animal of the sea, or land for that matter, scared us like the film Jaws did. This little movie from Spielberg not only furthered anyone’s fear of the water, but actually induced a phobia that had not existed prior to a viewing! How do I know this? Ugh. Okay… sadly, I was one of them. I had my first viewing of Jaws when I was fairly young, about 4 years old; and I’ll never forget it. We would regularly visit my family in New York up to about four times a year, and during the summer we, like many others, would hit the beach. Well, thanks to Bruce, the film scared my ass right off the beach to the point where I didn’t want my feet touching the sand. That’s right, folks. My father would have to carry me through the sand because I was having none of that shit.
Of course, I’ve grown way past that and the movie is now one of my favorites. You have to respect a film that has that kind of impact on someone, especially on a person like myself who was never scared so easily – even as a kid.
I honestly couldn’t let this piece fly without an honorable mention to, in my opinion, the goddamn scariest half-human/half-animal to ever walk across a screen. Reverend Lester Lowe’s alter ego of the werewolf is severely underrated as one of the most terrifyingly compelling performances from any lycan in film. The reason this werewolf in particular stands above the rest is his agenda. In human form, the good reverend has accepted his fate as sort of a gift from God in the sense he believes it has a purpose, as he explains in his tense monologue with Marty on the bridge about one of his victims, a pregnant gal by the name of Stella: “Stella was going to commit suicide, and if she had done so, she’d be burning in Hell right now. I took her physical life, but I saved her life eternally! You see how all things work out in the will and mind of God?”
Pretty twisted when you think about it. Some fans seem to think the wolf costume was a bit silly; however, I think it looks a lot better than a CGI werewolf and pulls off the scare factor quite nicely. So cheers to horror’s scariest mythological beast!
Spoiler Warning! If you haven’t seen Silver Bullet, you may want to avoid this clip entirely.