The Horror Fan’s Bucket List: Things Every Fan Must Do Before They Die
John Squires
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The sad truth about life is that none of us is immortal. We’re all going to die. And though many of our favorite horror movies have taught us otherwise, the chances of us emerging from our graves for one more night of fun are slim to none. We simply can’t outrun the Reaper, no matter how hard we try.
But that’s depressing. Let’s stop being so goddamn depressing.
BEFORE we die, we’ve got plenty of time to accomplish our goals, live our dreams, and get the most out of what precious little time we have on this Earth. And if you’re looking to make the most out of your own life, writing up a bucket list is a good place to start. I know this because Morgan Freeman and Jack Nicholson told me so.
In the event that you don’t have a bucket list of your own, we want to help get you started. So below you’ll find a handful of must-have experiences that are specifically geared towards horror fans like ourselves, and we strongly encourage you to work on crossing off the ones you haven’t yet. Because life is short, and death is near.
Sorry. That got depressing again. I take full responsibility.
Image Courtesy of Fantasm (2013)
1. GO TO A HORROR CONVENTION!
If there’s anything on this list that I would be incredibly saddened to hear that any horror fan went to the grave without experiencing, it’s this one. Different horror conventions take place all year round, all around the world, and there is simply no greater joy for the horror fan to experience than to be stuck in a hotel all weekend with other (sometimes stinky) fans – geeking out and bonding over all the things we love, spending our entire week’s paycheck on t-shirts and toys, and paying far too much money to get autographs from the filmmakers and actors we’ve spent so much of our time admiring. Quite simply, horror conventions are as close to Heaven as horror fans can come without actually dying, and I’d hate to see any fan go their whole life without experiencing the camaraderie and acceptance of the convention scene. Conventions are truly magical places.
Speaking of which…
2. GET CHOKED BY KANE HODDER!
I’m not sure when or how it started, but Kane Hodder provides a special service for each fan who gets an autograph and their picture taken with him: he chokes you… really, really hard. If you’ve ever seen a picture of a fan being choked by Hodder, I can assure you that the choke is 100% real, and as you might imagine, it hurts like a son of a bitch. Getting choked by Kane Hodder has become a rite of passage for the horror fan, and the experience of being throttled half to death by Jason Voorhees himself is a thrill that no fan’s life should go without. I’m not saying it’s gonna feel good while it’s happening, because it’s not, but I can promise you it’ll feel real damn good when you think back on it. Ya know, once the bruising goes away.
3. VISIT A FILMING LOCATION FROM YOUR FAVORITE MOVIE!
There’s just something about traveling to the place where one of your favorite movies was filmed that bonds you even more with that movie, and really makes you feel like you’re a part of it all. While that may not make sense to you right now, I can assure you that if you end up crossing this one off your bucket list, you will totally understand. Whether you want to take a swim in the actual Crystal Lake, eat a hamburger at the restaurant the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre house was turned into (shown above), trick or treat down the sidewalks that Michael Myers roamed, or go shopping in the iconic Dawn of the Dead mall, you absolutely must visit at least one iconic horror movie filming location before you die. It’s an exhilarating experience that will get you as close to actually being in the movie as you will ever get, and for that reason alone, it’s one you need to have.
4. WATCH EVERY INSTALLMENT OF EVERY FRANCHISE!
If you’re anything like me, you feel an incredible insecurity in calling yourself a hardcore horror fan without having seen every single installment in all the big franchises, whether we’re talking Hellraiser or Saw. Though I’m not gonna say this is going to be the most fun goal on this list to experience and cross off, it’s just something you’ve gotta do, whether you like it or not. And yes, that means you are going to have to watch both Leprechaun in the Hood and Leprechaun: Back 2 Tha Hood – sorry, but no one ever claimed that being a horror fan was fun ALL the time!
5. SEE YOUR FAVORITE FILM ON THE BIG SCREEN!
I don’t know about you, but most of my favorite horror movies were released either well before I was born, or well before I was old enough to go to the theater, which means I never got to experience a large majority of them with a crowd. No matter how many times you watch your favorite horror movie at home by yourself, you just haven’t fully experienced that movie until you’ve seen it in a movie theater, surrounded by hordes of fellow fans who know every line of dialogue and all the ins and outs of that movie. I’ve seen prints of films like The Shining and The Exorcist with a crowd, and those are experiences I am so glad I got to have. So if you ever hear that one of your favorite horror movies is playing on the big screen at a theater near you, don’t skip out on it because you’ve seen the movie a thousand times, or feel it’s a waste of money to pay to see it when you can watch it for free at home. Trust me, it’s a whole different experience.
6. TAKE PART IN A ZOMBIE WALK!
When you’re a horror fan, you haven’t lived… until you’ve died. The early 2000s saw the birth of the “Zombie Walk,” an event where horror fans gather together, slap on makeup and tattered clothes, and shamble around like zombies. Nowadays, in a time when zombies are more popular than ever, Zombie Walks have become incredibly common, and pretty much every state in the country plays host to at least one each year. So you’ve really got no excuse not to cross this one off your bucket list. Run a quick Google search and find out if the infection is soon spreading to your area!
7. ATTEND HALLOWEEN HORROR NIGHTS!
Originally launched at Universal Studios Orlando way back in 1991, Halloween Horror Nights is now bigger and better than ever, running through every October in Orlando, Hollywood, and even Singapore. For that one month out of every year, Universal Studios becomes a mecca for horror fans, the park outfitted with all sorts of haunted attractions, live shows and frightening experiences. Coolest of all, the attractions at Halloween Horror Nights are almost always based on actual horror movies, with sets from the films meticulously recreated so that you feel like you’re actually inside of the movies. I attended the event back in 2014, when films like Halloween and The Purge were part of the festivities, and it’s truly an experience I’ll never forget.
8. SPEND A NIGHT AT THE STANLEY HOTEL!
Often times incorrectly cited as the hotel where The Shining was filmed, Colorado’s Stanley Hotel is actually the hotel that inspired Stephen King to write the novel. Essentially, the supposedly haunted Stanley Hotel is the real-life version of the fictional Overlook Hotel, and if you were hoping that the owners of the Stanley celebrate and play up this fact, then you’ll be happy to know that they most certainly do. In fact, The Shining plays on a continuous loop on a certain channel of each room’s television! Spending a night in a haunted hotel is something every horror fan should do at least once in their lifetime, and if you’re gonna do it, you might as well do it at the Stanley. So book your room (their room 217 was the real life basis for the Overlook’s room 237), pick up some ghost-hunting gear, and watch out for those creepy twins that like to hang out in the hallway. Oh, and don’t forget to bring your typewriter. And a shiny new axe. Never know when you might need to hack your way through a door.
9. CONTRIBUTE TO THE GENRE!
More than any other genre of film, the horror genre is a fan-driven one, and the community thrives on fan interaction and contribution. If you want to be more than a mere spectator, I encourage you to do everything you possibly can to take part in the genre and the community, and help to make it an even better place for both current and future fans. The possibilities for getting involved are literally endless, whether you want to start up a blog to spread the word on movies you like, donate money to help movies get made, or even make movies of your own. If you truly love the genre, give back every chance you can get, and become an active part of the community that you so cherish. Because without us fans and our involvement, the genre itself is only as mortal as we are. We urge you to never underestimate the power you hold in keeping horror alive and kicking.
How many of these have you already crossed off your list, and what other experiences do you think are essential for the horror fan? Comment below and let us know!
