The new horror film You’re Next is anything but traditional. So to celebrate the release of this new diabolical nightmare, we’ve decided to bring you a list that is anything but traditional itself. Take a gander at the Top 9 Most Unorthodox Weapons in Horror!
Sure, the horror purists love their butcher knives and machetes, but there is so much more out there. And these nine films managed to work in some really creative kills. Some honorable mentions need to be recognized, such as the cotton candy gun from Killer Klowns from Outer Space and the cricket bat used to dispense zombies in Shaun of the Dead. Also, the garbage disposal used to unhand William Devane in Rolling Thunder was a unique choice indeed, and we must tip our caps to the Saw franchise for using blades, barbed wire and butcher knives in tons of new and exciting ways.
Freddy’s Razor Glove – A Nightmare on Elm Street
Knives for fingers. That’s one of the first things we learn about Freddy Krueger, that the legend says he has knives for fingers. Of course it’s actually a glove, and perhaps the most famous glove since Michael Jackson moonwalked his way into America’s heart decades ago. But Freddy’s glove wasn’t always such an iconic image. In fact, it was quite unique when we first laid eyes on it 30 years ago. Crudely handmade, the glove represented Krueger’s aggression, power and viciousness. We’ve all gotten the opportunity to try one on at some point, and it’s hard not to love the feeling of wearing that glove. It is definitely invigorating. One of the finest and most creative weapons we’ve ever seen, Freddy’s glove is indeed a classic!
Christmas Light Electric Chair – Silent Night
One horror film that seemed to slip through the cracks was the 2012 Christmas-themed movie Silent Night, starring Malcolm McDowell and Jaime King. This little slice of yuletide nastiness was a real treat, including such things as Santa going apeshit with a flamethrower and using a cattle prod on one particularly naughty little girl. But easily the most creative kill in Silent Night comes right off the bat when “Santa” creates an electric chair out of Christmas lights and fries a victim at the beginning of the film. Now that’s how to get the ball rolling. If you look carefully, you can see the poor bastard ride the Christmas lightning in the trailer below. Ho, ho, ho!
Belt Sander Teeth Cleaning – Hatchet
Victor Crowley and the Hatchet series helped to reinvigorate the slasher sub-genre of horror with some really unique and ingenious gore scenes, the likes of which we hadn’t seen in a long time. From the obscenely large chainsaw he used to dispatch of multiple victims at one time to pulling a woman’s head apart by the mouth to ripping the spines out of a couple of horror legends, Victor Crowley (and his creator, Adam Green) needs to be commended for his creativity. However, one particular weapon stands out as perhaps the most brutal and toe-curling of them all: the gas-powered belt sander. Anyone who has ever taken a wood shop class in high school (btw…do they even have wood shop in high school anymore?) has undoubtedly nicked a finger on the belt sander. Now, imagine taking that spinning monster in the mouth! In the original Hatchet film, that’s exactly what happened to one of Crowley’s victims, destroying her face and making the final few moments of her life extremely uncomfortable. Ouch!
Microwaved Baddies – Gremlins
This one was a classic from the moment the beady-eyed beastie exploded inside the microwave in the original Gremlins film. Shooed there by Mrs. Peltzer (played by Frances Lee McCain) after shooting a Gremlin in the face with bug spray, this unfortunate green menace found exactly what it was like when microwaves are weaponized. Director Joe Dante had to come up with something to top the Gremlin killed in the Peltzer blender bowl, and what better way to do that than to explode one in the microwave? Weapons can be found anywhere… one just has to look for them.
The Captive Bolt Pistol Is Stunning – No Country for Old Men
Although No Country for Old Men is certainly more of a thriller than horror, we must recognize Anton Chigurh’s weapon of choice, the captive bolt pistol. Chigurh was played brilliantly by Javier Bardem, a role which garnered him an Academy Award for Best Supporting Actor as well as dozens of additional accolades. And certainly, one of the most memorable features of the film was Chigurh’s curious weapon with an air canister attached to it. Average viewers wondered just what the hell it was, and some quick research unveiled it to be a captive bolt pistol… a tool used for doing some of the dirty work at slaughterhouses. Now that’s thinking outside the box.
Fuck it! An Insane Sex Toy – Se7en
The movie Se7en punched audiences in the face like a fist wearing brass knuckles. It was intelligent and brutal, stunning and raw. Kevin Spacey played a nameless killer with an unspeakable plan. The combination of Spacey with Morgan Freeman and Brad Pitt as the detectives pursuing him was cinematic gold, but one actor with an extremely small part actually stole the show as far as delivering a huge, powerful punch. Leland Orser has nearly 75 television and film credits under his belt, but he may have none more powerful than the performance he delivered in Se7en. His character participated in the LUST portion of John Doe’s murderous rampage. We’ve attached a picture of the apparatus Doe slapped onto Orser’s unfortunate character and forced him to have sex with a prostitute while wearing the devious device or face the wrath of the revolver he had in his mouth. Heavy stuff, folks. A truly twisted weapon that delivered a really memorable scene!
Lionel Fires Up the Lawn Mower – Dead Alive
Peter Jackson’s early zombie gorefest Dead Alive features some of the most over-the-top gross-out scenes ever seen in horror. A woman eats her own ear; our hero, Lionel, is captured by his monstrously mutated mother and actually stuffed back into her womb in the climax of the film. But the scene that gives Dead Alive a claim to the title of Goriest Film of All Time is the famous “lawn mower” scene. It’s very rarely that we see a movie character actually lift up a push mower and shove the blade into the faces of his enemies. But that’s exactly how Lionel single-handedly dispatches of a gruesome horde of undead monsters. One of the most laughably beloved, bloody and brutal scenes in old school horror.
You Name it, FD Kills With It! – Final Destination Series
Perhaps no series of films was more creative in its use of everyday items in accidental killing than Final Destination. The unseen force that stalks the victims in these films had a laundry list of seemingly harmless things that would deal a deathblow to one unsuspecting victim after another. Just a few off the top: a bathtub clothesline, a flagpole, a prosthetic arm, a weight bench, a fire escape ladder and a tanning bed. All seemingly common items that, when manipulated by a malicious force, became deadly. We couldn’t narrow it down to just one thing, but we managed to find a cool video that depicts the deaths in all the Final Destination films. Enjoy!
Giant Ceramic Penis Statue – A Clockwork Orange
And what better way to end this list then with the most remarkably insane weapon ever used in a horror/thriller movie! And we say that without a doubt. In Stanley Kubrick’s 1971 A Clockwork Orange, there are plenty of violent scenes but none more memorable than when our anti-hero, Alex (played by Malcolm McDowell), crushes the skull of a character known only as “The Cat Lady” (played by Miriam Karlin) with a sculpture of a giant penis (and ass). That one pretty much takes the cake. Check please!
And be sure to check out You’re Next, coming at you on August 23rd!
The Davison family comes under attack from a terrifying group of sadistic murderers during a family reunion getaway. Barricaded in their secluded vacation home, they fight off a barrage of axes, crossbows, and machetes from both inside and outside the house. However, the masked killers didn’t count on Erin (Vinson), the young girlfriend of the eldest Davison son whose mysterious past has made her very difficult to kill.
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