9 Times Freddy Krueger Was The Ultimate Mean Girl
Sharai Bohannon
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Freddy Krueger is one of the most iconic personalities in horror. Most of us grew up watching him kill teens who were unfortunate enough to live on Elm Street the way we were supposed to watch Barney and Friends. However, what most of us were too young to realize was that Freddy’s words were often sharper than the blades on his glove. Yeah, sure he’s there to threaten violence and death. He’s also ruining sleep patterns and that’s rude. However, his true power was being petty. His hurtful one-liners are probably what actually killed most of the teens in this franchise. No other supernatural slasher kills morale and self-esteem quite like Freddy Krueger.
That’s probably why I LOVED him so much as a child. As someone who grew up on Elm Street (one of my podcasts even tilts our burnt hat at it in our title), I have nothing but fond memories of Freddy. And I would be lying if I didn’t give the old Krueger his credit. Also, shout out to Robert Englund for using his classical training to teach us how to deliver insults and serve face. Someone, please tell him he’s a prince because I know he’s not going to read this. Anywho, I spent this week trying to whittle it down to just nine Freddy Krueger lines out of thousands.
“Who gives a fuck what you think?” (A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: The Dream Warriors)
It’s a simple and very direct line directed at Zsa Zsa Gabor during a late-night show interview. However, it also lets us know Freddy gives no shits about celebrities. He will interrupt their interviews because Freddy is down to clown in any dream scenario. He’ll always make a scene and promises to stay out of pocket. Not only was this cameo wild but it also told us that Freddy was officially on a whole new level of petty.
“Now that’s a face only a mother could love!” (Freddy Vs. Jason)
Petty Freddy wasn’t made for teamwork. He delivers quite a few insults to Jason Voorhees when they teamed up for this chaotic movie. However, him looming over a child version of Jason while waving his mother’s head at him is what stands out. We know Freddy loves to bring his own props to his shenanigans but damn. The insult cuts very deep and is possibly part of the reason he and Jason had to go their separate ways after this murder spree.
“Now no one sleeps!” (A Nightmare on Elm Street 4: The Dream Master)
We watched Freddy chase a lot of people in their dream and keep them awake for days. However, the way he delivers this line always sends me. It’s very, “If I can’t sleep then no one sleeps.” As a Gemini, I respect that. It’s also very, “Have you not watched my last three movies?” energy. Give him a crown to fit on top of his dusty burned hat.
“You’ve got the body, I’ve got the brain.” (A Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy’s Revenge)
There’s so much going on in this movie that even I didn’t unpack this insult until recently. Because Freddy is trying to get inside Jesse the whole movie this scene doesn’t feel special in the heat of the moment. However, if you really look at it, he’s calling Jesse a himbo. It’s big auntie at a family holiday telling you to marry while you still have your looks. It’s a compliment insult that will probably be coming up in Jesse’s therapy sessions after all of this murderous nightmare demon stuff is out of the way.
“This is it, Jennifer, your big break in TV” (A Nightmare On Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors)
Freddy really interrupted this girl’s dream to pull her into a TV while making fun of her for having a goal. We probably sensed Jennifer wasn’t destined for fame and fortune, but telling her impending death is her moment. Brutal. Also, addressing her by name in the one-liner is classic Petty Freddy. I hate how much I laughed at this scene as an obviously well-adapted child. This scene is also where we get the ICONIC “Welcome to primetime, bitch!” that could’ve just been this whole article.
“If the food doesn’t kill ya, the service will.” (A Nightmare On Elm Street 4: The Dream Master)
This moment is burned into my brain and is the first image of Freddy Krueger I can remember from my childhood. Is it the delivery of the line? Is it that he is enjoying his soul pizza and taunting another victim? I don’t know. I just know that it cracked me up as a kid that was supposed to be taking a nap when I saw it. I love Petty Freddy and his intimidating people while taking jabs at diner food gives me joy. Sadly, the scene also includes a “soul food” line that brings it down to hell.
“Well, it ain’t Dr. Seuss.” (A Nightmare On Elm Street 4: The Dream Master)
Petty Freddy taught me sarcasm at an early age. This line not only sent me into fits of giggles but I used to quote it often. It might’ve also been what led to Freddy being my first imaginary friend as a kid. Admittedly, Englund’s delivery and timing elevate this line to the gold standard. He’s having fun and serving us some of the most biting dark humor and we are welcome.
“Sticks and stone may break my bones, but nothing will ever kill me.” (Freddy’s Dead: The Final Nightmare)
Petty Freddy is no stranger to a playground taunt. However, this line manages to be intimidating while also giving us an old Broadway actor doing another farewell tour. I would hand over my money to see this Vegas show where Freddy is just tossing balls in the air and they’re accidentally going into the net. This line shouldn’t work. I don’t know why it works. But I fight the urge to lose my cool every time I hear it. Maybe I’m just broken. Or maybe Petty Freddy is just that much more entertaining when he’s intimidating us.
“Welcome to primetime, bitch!” (A Nightmare On Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors)
A Freddy quote list wouldn’t be a Freddy quote list without this one. It’s quintessential Freddy. It’s Freddy at his finest. I wanted to cut it because after looking at this list I realized this scene apparently has most of the lines that made me. However, I think it’s a testament to Petty Freddy that he took this brief scene and gave us so many memorable gems. That, or I’m finding out today that my favorite film in the franchise is Dream Warriors. I don’t know if I can handle that revelation right now. I promise to unpack that the next time I binge these movies though.
This week of soul searching led me to believe that these are currently my nine favorite Petty Freddy quotes. I still want to drag in like 45 more because he practically raised me, so I have notes. Plus, the original franchise has eight installments, and that is a lot of chances for Freddy to be extra petty. The possibilities are endless, and this is too much pressure!
Let me know your favorite Freddy Krueger quotes at @misssharai.
