Sammy’s Back in Roid Rage: The Christmas Special
Steve Barton
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Okay, so maybe he missed the actual holidays a bit, but that didn’t stop writer/director Ryan Lightbourn from being in the giving spirit. Fans of indie shorts will no doubt remember his previous film, Roid Rage, a movie that can be accurately described as the anal version of Brain Damage. Well, ho, ho, ho…Lightbourn has a belated gift for you…Roid Rage: The Christmas Special.
Fans of the original film will no doubt dig this holiday entry, which we have below in its entirety. If you haven’t seen Roid Rage don’t worry, we can get you caught up pretty quickly. Sammy works in a nuclear power plant. Sammy went to drop a massive deuce one day and pushed too hard. Sammy got a hemorrhoid. The hemorrhoid came to life because of his exposure to nuclear waste. The hemorrhoid has bad intentions. And as the police slowly move in on Sammy and his killer ‘roid you get to hear lines like…“Check out this grundle hair they found at the scene.” Even after six seasons I never recall Dexter saying that. (Maybe Masuka once, but never Dexter).
By the end of the original film, Sammy (Zach Canfield) had somewhat harnessed his unique gift and in Roid Rage: The Christmas Special he uses his martial arts skills and ass-power to battle an evil drug lord named Santa (Christian Kelty). I believe this was the original concept for Scarface 2 but it was tabled along the way somewhere as they were unable to make a believable looking radioactive hemorrhoid on the allotted budget.
This is a really amusing short. Over the top gore and campy dialogue delivered by some unique actors (did I mention there’s even a little person in it? Charles Shaw plays Santa’s Little Helper) Keeping in the holiday spirit they even worked the Trans-Siberian Orchestra into the soundtrack. Now that’s festive. Lightbourn is hoping to work Roid Rage into a feature film. Check out the antics at the Roid Rage Facebook page and official website.
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