Repossessed (DVD)
Reviewed by Uncle Creepy
Starring Leslie Nielsen, Linda Blair, Ned Beatty, Anthony Starke
Directed by Bob Logan
Distributed by Lionsgate Home Entertainment
The Exorcist is a classic film through and through. It stands as not only one of the best horror films of all time, but as one of the best damned films period! When Leslie Nielsen was at the height of his popularity in the early Nineties, no film was safe from a good old fashion slapstick laced mocking. Not even the tale of a demon defiling a little girl.
In Repossessed Nielsen plays Father Jebedaiah Mayii, a retired priest who is no stranger to doing battle with the dark one. His last fight over the soul of little Nancy Aglet damn near killed him. Hence his holy sabbatical. Years have passed since that incident, and Nancy (Blair) is now all grown up with a family of her own. There's just one hitch -- the demon comes back, and before you know it Aglet is once again spitting pea soup and spinning her head like a top. Will Mayii return to save her once again, or will he leave her in the hands of an inexperienced young priest and some goofball televangelists who think this is all a stunt?
Sound good? No? Well then, consider yourself one of the few people on this planet with a brain because it is not. In fact it is garbage. The jokes are not funny, the script overall isn't even slightly entertaining, the sight gags don't work, and everyone involved should be thoroughly embarrassed. It really doesn't get much worse than this. Phoned in and shit out, this type of drivel could have only been expelled from the burning bowels of the demon Pazuzu himself.
The only special features to be found here, unless you consider scene selection special, are a subtitle trivia track that's just about as lacking as everything else associated with this movie and a trailer. Insert biting, spite-laced sarcasm and hatred here --> What?!? No commentary?
Released as part of Lionsgate's "The Lost Collection", this is a flick that should have stayed buried. I remembered it being bad back then, but nothing could have prepared me for how truly awful it was seeing it through much older eyes. Wow. Just wow. Avoid this like you would a proposed escort with an itchy groin.
Special Features

1 out of 5
Special Features:

1 out of 5
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I remember the "Lick me" joke...I don't remember it being a bad film at all....not any worse then anything Leslie Nielson has done before or since.
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Submitted by Aghora Eats Kittens on Mon, 04/13/2009 - 6:59pm.
I thought that the handicapped parking joke was funny.
That, and the Devil With the Blue Dress song are the only things of this movie that I really remember.
Submitted by ajburton29 on Sat, 04/11/2009 - 1:02am.
Wait...so you're telling me this movie, one that I rented and adored watching when it first came out on video (when I was nine), is horrible?
Having not seen it since then, you may be right.
Submitted by FilmCritic3000 on Thu, 04/09/2009 - 11:46pm.
You have no idea.
Submitted by Uncle Creepy on Fri, 04/10/2009 - 12:55am.
I thought it was a pretty decent spoof....I mean, honestly, Creepy, would you rather watch REPOSSESSED again, or one of the allegedly funny ____MOVIES?
Submitted by Rorschach on Thu, 04/09/2009 - 9:35pm.
I think REPOSSESSED falls squarely in the "allegedly funny" category itself.
Submitted by Foywonder on Thu, 04/09/2009 - 10:48pm.
Now THIS I am shocked by. Foy of all people, doesn't like REPOSSESSED?
HUH?!?!
I'd think the schlock-o-meter would be pegged out on this one.
Submitted by Rorschach on Fri, 04/10/2009 - 4:12pm.
What the fuck is wrong with you? 1 out of 5? Did you ever even see this movie before? You should count yourself lucky to have seen it. I can't believe this shit. Calling Repossessed a bad movie, what the hell. The theme song alone is awesome enough to impregnate an infertile man from a distance of 100 miles.
Maybe you should have watched C Me Dance. I hear it takes the exact same premise and does it with a Christian fundamentalist twist.
Submitted by Jon Condit on Thu, 04/09/2009 - 7:47pm.
It's lucky it got one. That was being generous! Charitable even!
Submitted by Uncle Creepy on Thu, 04/09/2009 - 7:50pm.
Unforgivable.
Submitted by Jon Condit on Thu, 04/09/2009 - 7:52pm.
Maybe if I put some mayonnaise on it! HHRRRMMMM!
Submitted by Uncle Creepy on Thu, 04/09/2009 - 7:53pm.
I think we just found the one person on planet earth who actually considers Repossessed a great movie and his name is Jon Condit. He is right though about the score being too harsh. I'd have given it a solid 1 1/2.
Submitted by Foywonder on Thu, 04/09/2009 - 9:27pm.
Okay, I may not go with -great- movie, but I'm a huge fan. Come on, 'lick me...LICK ME'. There are some really funny moments in that movie that I remember decades after the last time I watched it.
So, apparently, it's retards, table for two. ;P
Mr. Dark
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Full-Time Freelance Smartass
Submitted by Mr. Dark on Fri, 04/10/2009 - 12:52pm.