Reviewed by Uncle Creepy
Starring Brady Matthews, Lisa Crilley, Heather Donahue, Chris Torres, Bill Cobbs
Directed by Halder Gomes and Gerson Sanginitto
Distributed by Lionsgate Home Entertainment
If there’s one place many of us don’t want to visit, it’s the morgue, the reason being that we’ll get there soon enough anyway. No need to rush things, you know? But then there are the people who work there. The ones whose time is spent as if it were like any other place. Ever wonder what their days or nights are like? Lionsgate’s newest chiller The Morgue offers us a glimpse into the life of one such person.
Margo (Crilley) is the night-time cleaning lady at the local funeral home, and she’s totally unfazed by all of the death and sorrow surrounding her. She’s perky, cute, and about to have one hell of a night. It’s all business as usual until groups of strangers (including Heather Donahue of The Blair Witch Project, whose — ironically enough — first line in the film has the word “fuck” in it) start showing up in need of help. Some are bloodied, some are hungry, and some just have to pee. What starts as a nice distraction for our hero-chick quickly turns to horror as the spirit of a crazed mortician who had committed suicide begins knocking off our visitors one-by-one.
There are quite a few things to like about The Morgue though I’m guessing that after reading just the above set-up alone your well-trained mind is already wondering what the twist is. Guess what? You’re right. It’s exactly what you think it is although I must say that the directing team of Halder Gomes and Gerson Sanginitto do a great job of laying it all out for us at the end. Even though you know what’s happened, how it all goes down is worth taking the trip for. In fact, this filmmaking duo make a great run of things on all counts except for when it comes to reigning in their actors. Everyone is just too emphatic in their delivery of lines at times, and as a result there are plenty of laughably awkward moments. Still, it’s great to see Donahue back for some more spookiness!
The DVD itself is also on the average side of the cold metal slab. All we get in terms of supplemental goodness is a trailer and a near twenty-minute long making-of featurette that’s rife with the usual yadda yadda.
In the end this trip to The Morgue is kind of like a one-night stand. It’s cheap fun, better than expected, but come the next day you’ll hardly remember its name. Check it out only if you’re in the market for some quickie horror fodder. And filmmakers … give us more Donahue! I always dug her!
3 out of 5
2 1/2 out of 5
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