Reviewed by Uncle Creepy
Starring Dick Durock, Mark Lindsay Chapman, Carrell Myers, Jesse Zeigler, Scott Garrison, Mark Lindsay Chapman’s hair
Directed by Various
Distributed by Shout! Factory
“Do not bring your evil into my swamp!”
So says Dick Durock as the mossy DC Comics hero of Swamp Thing. And he means it too. In the comic book Swampy’s legendary battles with the evil Dr. Arcane and his minions are the stuff of illustrated myth. In this TV show? Not so much. However, the live action Swamp Thing and Arcane (Chapman) have done more than their fair share of delivering to fans some of the most absurd viewing experiences possible.
This release includes just Part One of Season Three and is a surreal experience, man. For the basic overview of what’s going on, allow me to point you to my partner-in-crime, The Foywonder’s review of Swamp Thing: The Series Volume One here, as there’s no one else on the planet who can put into words the odd madness that ensues within this series better than he has.
Everything that was weird, stupid, incoherent, and strange in Seasons One and Two has carried over to this third go-around, but this time there’s a bit of a twist. Amongst the many ridiculous storylines that include the usual band of midget creatures, Swampy’s brooding mood swings, and of course — Dr. Arcane’s HUGE mane of Eighties hair, you’ll also find plots ripped directly from some of our favorite horror movies. I’m not talking about coincidental similarities here; I’m talking Asylum quality mockbuster ripoffs starring the Swamp Thing.
Ever wonder what would have happened if the Swamp Thing were to have visited little Regan instead of Father Merrin? And what if he brought some Serpent and the Rainbow type shenanigans with him for good measure? Wonder no longer, my friend! But wait! What if a killer fog rolled into your sleepy little town? Who would you look to in order to save you? Never mind Tom Atkins, Swamp Thing is there to kick the source of its misty little ass! Hell, there’s even an episode entitled “A Nightmare on Jackson Street”! This stuff really has to be seen to be believed. Wow. Color me stymied.
Yet, despite all these ludicrous bizarro-world set-ups, you just can’t turn these damned things off. Swamp Thing: The Series Volume Two exhibits a special kind of weirdness that will rivet you in front of your television while nonsensical episode after nonsensical episode fly by at a scant twenty minutes each. Maybe it’s because the viewer will want to see what levels of bad the makers of this show will sink to, or maybe it’s because we’ll just be sitting there in a state of shocked disbelief at what is transpiring before our very eyes. Who knows?
There are no supplemental extras to be found here, and for that I’m thankful. My now frail psyche may not have been able to handle much more.
There’s no doubt this series, in a word, sucks; but you just haven’t lived until you’ve seen Swamp Thing perform an exorcism while a voodoo priest dances away chanting incoherently. Watch at your own risk. If only to see how disturbingly large Mark Lindsay Chapman’s hairdo gets as the episodes dissolve away like acid under your tongue. Again … wow.
2 out of 5
0 out of 5
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