Piranha 3D (Blu-ray / DVD)

Piranha 3D on Blu-ray and DVDReviewed by Uncle Creepy

Starring Ving Rhames, Elisabeth Shue, Christopher Lloyd, Jerry O’Connell, Steven R. McQueen, Jessica Szohr

Directed by Alexandre Aja

Distributed by Sony Pictures Home Entertainment

Oh, Piranha 3D. How much do we love thee? Let me count the ways …

We love you for your gratuitous nudity with breasts bouncing to and fro. We love you for your over-the-top violence and still marvel that you received an R rating. We love you for letting Christopher Lloyd go all “Doc Brown” again. We love you for embracing your trashiness like no other film this year. We love you for your poetic underwater nymph scene. We love you for having the audacity to spit Jerry O’Connell’s ragged penis into the screen and at the audience. We love you for showing a very familiar character from Jaws that the way to go home was through a swirling abyss filled with creatures with razor-sharp teeth. We love you for …

Okay. I gotta stop. I could go on forever. Here’s the deal: Piranha 3D is probably the most fun we’ve had with a movie in forever, and Sony Entertainment has given the devil its due by delivering one hell of a home video package. We’ll get to all that in a minute, but first here’s a quick plot crunch.

It’s simple. It’s nothing more than it needs to be. An underwater tremor unleashes legions of man-eating prehistoric fish during spring break in an otherwise sleepy Arizona town. Along the way the local police, headed up by a still very hot Elisabeth Shue and “The Obama of Piranhas”, Ving Rhames, attempt to stop the carnage with a little help from various bits of walking piranha bait until an orgy of violence ensues, the likes of which you’re not likely to forget. Ever. Throw in a couple of subplots involving Shue’s kids in danger while a porn producer keeps his cameras rolling and — boom — instant family classic!

Piranha 3D on Blu-ray and DVDPiranha 3D takes no prisoners, pulls no punches, and doesn’t give the slightest shit about anything resembling good taste. Its no-holds-barred approach to the material is both refreshing and absolutely unrelenting. You’re going to be grinning from ear-to-ear the entire time breasts are bared and bodies are shredded with reckless abandon. If you’re not, you had better check your pulse.

On Blu-ray the film is absolutely gorgeous. The colors pop like you wouldn’t believe without becoming over-saturated, the black levels are spot on (for the most part), and the only time the image suffers at all is during the inherently dark underwater sequences when things become slightly muddy. Other than that every chomping set of jaws and every masticated upon limb are present and accounted for in startling detail. The DTS 5.1 HD sound mix, which brings every instance of flesh tearing to the forefront, will have your home theatre system absolutely rocking. It’s the perfect complement to the stellar 1080p transfer.

In terms of Blu-ray you can buy it one of two ways – either as a 3D Blu-ray (requires a 3DTV and a 3D enabled Blu-ray player to watch in 3D) with a commentary and ten featurettes or as a 2D package that’s home to a boatload of additional special features. The ten featurettes (included on both Blu-ray packages) play as a film in and of themselves, clocking in at a whopping two hours and ten minutes so even if you buy the 3D package, you’ll hardly be missing out on the supplemental goodies. Unique to the regular Blu-ray are a gaggle of deleted scenes with optional commentary, a storyboard gallery, and a host of theatrical and television spots.

DVD owners are kind of sunk. All you get are five of the ten featurettes and the commentary track. Sign of the times, dudes. Time to upgrade.

Simply put, Piranha 3D is nothing short of a must-have package if only for the gloriously outrageous film alone. In the theatre I watched the film in back-to-back screenings and loved every second of it. I can only imagine how much play this is going to be getting around these parts. If you missed it in the multiplex (and shame on you if you did), here’s your chance to atone for your cinematic sins. Order yourself a copy like yesterday, break out the brews, call your friends, light ’em if you’ve got ’em, and let the good times splat!

Blu-ray 3D Special Features

  • Filmmaker Commentary
  • 10 Behind-the-Scenes Featurettes
  • In addition to the 3D version of the film, the Blu-ray 3D contains a 2D version playable on all existing Blu-ray players

    Blu-ray Special Features

  • Filmmaker Commentary
  • Deleted Scenes with Optional Commentary
  • Deleted Storyboard Sequences
  • 10 Behind-the-Scenes Featurettes
  • Storyboard Gallery
  • Piranha 3D Trailer & TV Spots

    DVD Special Features

  • Filmmaker Commentary
  • 5 Behind-the-Scenes Featurettes


    4 1/2 out of 5

    Special Features:

    5 out of 5

    Discuss Piranha 3D in our comments section below!

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  • Steve Barton

    You're such an inspiration for the ways that I will never, ever choose to be.

    Get Your Box of Dread Now
    *US Residents Only .
    • kiddcapone

      You mean to tell me with all the unnecessary UNRATED releases dropped on the market with 2 minutes of bullshit put back into it, they didn’t grab some of the cut out gore and put it back in ??? Really ??????

    • will graham

      Just for the record the uk dvd has all 10 featurettes and deleted scenes.

    • The Buz

      I will be getting this day it comes out. Cannot wait.

    • Terminal

      Hated this movie, so I doubt I’ll get it. I didn’t think boobs could be boring, but they proved me wrong.
      “We are bad guys. That means we’ve got more to do other than bullying companies. It’s fun to lead a bad man’s life.”

      • Uncle Creepy

        You mean you didn’t learn that lesson from Bitch Slap?

    • fceurich39

      too bad that the Aja’s directors cut of piranha wasnt released on blu i remember he said it would be the version on the blu-ray i wonder what happened?

    • Laguna

      Sounds like i will be getting the blu in 2d…but dammit…i should have seen it in that third dimension.

    • Laguna

      What about the 3D? Do i need a 3d tv?? That totally blows

      • Masked Slasher

        The 3D Blu-ray contains both a 3D and 2D version of the film – both in high definition. But yeah, you need a 3D TV (and a 3D Blu-ray player, or the PS3) in order to enjoy the 3D version of the film.

        There’s also a 2D-only Blu-ray which contains all of the extras, etc. That is the one I’ll be getting.

    • CMax

      Fuck blu-ray getting all the good shit. Fucking tired of it.

      • The Woman In Black

        Like Creepy said, it’s a sign of the times. I fought the change, too, but once I did it, I haven’t looked back once. The difference really is amazing.

        • Masked Slasher

          The only DVD titles I still buy are obscure genre ones that will likely never see the next format.

          Blu-ray is phenomenal.

        • nonserviam03

          I’d be way more inclined to switch over to Blu Ray if my laptop played them, since that’s what I always end up watching movies on, but it doesn’t, and I don’t think I’m getting a new one any time soon, so I’ll stick with DVD for now.

      • Vanvance1

        Dude, loss less audio alone makes it worth it. The difference with a good receiver and speakers is amazing.