Knob Goblins (Short)
Matt Boiselle
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Starring Tom Gore, Jaysen P. Buterin, Michael Ray Williams
Directed by Christopher G. Moore
I’ve witnessed some pretty hellacious stuff over the course of my reviewing career – evicerations, decapitations, necrophilia… and that’s just the PG-13 stuff. But there arises a certain level of squeamishness when some poor fellow’s member is forcefully removed from his, AHEM, “person,” even when presented in a comedic light. In Christopher G. Moore’s 8-minute short (maybe I shouldn’t use the word SHORT to describe this) Knob Goblins, no bigger fear is confronted than that of a phallic displacement by masticating mayhem. There, now that I’ve got you all shifting in your seats, let’s begin, shall we?
The quickie takes us to the childhood home of a psychotherapy patient who is attempting to overcome the final hurdle that has plagued his fragile mind for years. Some time ago, his younger brother was brutally murdered by a “Knob Goblin” – a sluglike creature that punishes those who engage in the act of “intimate self-pleasure” – yeah, I was a little taken aback myself. In any event, his final roadblock towards freeing his mind will come in the basement of his old homestead, and I can guarantee you that this won’t be any normal therapy session.
Outside of being fast to the finish, the short is filled with funny performances and has a nice puddle of gore for the hounds to waddle through. Moore makes the most of a condensed time frame and gives the audience something to chuckle at. Who knows? Maybe this could even branch out to a franchise? So I’ll offer this caveat to all the guys out there: Keep your instruments tightly packed cause if these friggin’ things ever did exist, STD’s would be the LEAST of our worries.
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Film
Categorized:Reviews
