The Slashening (2015)
Matt Boiselle
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Starring Anna Callegari, Elyse Brandau, Samantha Reese Schecter
Directed by Brandon Bassham
There are some movies that should come with a disclaimer: WARNING – Upon completion of this film, you should notice the disappearance of a multitude of brain cells, causing speechlessness, stumbling, and muttering to yourself about how much you deeply regretted ever pushing the “Play” button on your DVD player.
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, may I be allowed to present Exhibit A: The Slashening.
From director Brandon Bassham, and utilizing a roster made up of comedic actors on loan from the Upright Citizens Brigade Theatre in New York City, the movie focuses on a group of five friends that decide to put on a booze-laden slumber-party bash and then are systematically offed by a crazed killer. The film is laden with raunchy humor and every stereotypical character you can imagine – we’ve got the good girl, the nerd, the slut, the drug-riddled rehab graduate (this chick snorts coke in a way that could make Tony Montana proud), rounded out by a group of moronic “bros” that should prove to make nice fodder for the meat grinder. Hosted by Eva (Lily Du), this party is clearly heading for some trouble on the horizon. Sure, it looks like every other slasher wanna-be to roll into the crapper over the past number of years, but hey, it’s a formula and it’s proven to be effective in both style and substance… not in THIS case, however.
As the party rages, and both the beer and drugs are consumed in mass quantities, the murders commence at the hands of a killer who opted for a dual combo of Michael Myers coveralls and a burlap sack for a head cover, a la Mr. Voorhees from Friday Part II… inventive touch, without a doubt. The laughs never climb out from a sophomoric hole, and while some of them will provide a few chuckles from time to time, it unfortunately cannot fully distract you from the horrific acting that will hit your unfunny bone like a 50-lb. sledgehammer shot.
As the curtain drops, The Slashening is a valiant attempt at following the lead of Bassham’s prior film, Fear Town, USA, but as far as keeping up with the lead dog, this one strays off the trail and gets lost DEEP in the woods. I like my slasher films, and I like a little humor interjected from time to time, but this one is far too goofy for its own good. Recommended only for those who feel the need to ply themselves with liquor in hopes of blacking out before the credits roll.
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Film
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