Top Cow’s Magdalena Converts Jenna Dewan

Magdalena!According to the Hollywood Reporter, Jenna Dewan and her boobs have nabbed the lead role in a motion picture adaptation of Top Cow’s top heavy comic Magdalena. Dewan will star as Patience, a very attractive young woman who discovers she’s the next in a line of female warriors descended from Mary Magdalene that fight the forces of evil.

I’ll let the always reliable Wikipedia fill in the rest of the comic’s concept:

After the crucifixion and resurrection of Jesus Christ, Mary Magdalene, reputed to be his wife, gave birth to a daughter, Sarah. From this child is descended the holy lineage of the Magdalena, a royal bloodline that passes great power and great honor from mother to daughter. The Magdelena serves as the warrior and protector of the Catholic Church.

The Magdalena has the ability to see into the human heart, to show people the error of their ways and give them the choice to redeem their sins. There is only one in a generation, and she alone stands and takes arms against the evils of the world. Apart from the powers she is born with, the Magdalena wields the Spear of Destiny, the spear that pierced the side of Christ, as a holy and formidable weapon against the twisted and the evil.

Since the Middle Ages, the Roman Catholic Church has been the Magdalena’s employer. They raise her from childhood and train her until she is ready to take hold of her destiny. It is the Inquisition, a secretive and mystical but powerful council of cardinals, that oversees the Magdalena’s activities and chooses her missions.

So it’s more or less Buffy, the Vampire Slayer but with a Catholic bent and more heaving bosoms.

Top Cow Comics unveiled the bra-busting The Magdalena (the “The” seems to have been scrapped for the movie version) in 1998 during that wonderful time period when you couldn’t walk into a comic book store without having dozens upon dozens of scantily clad, mammoth-breasted superheroines staring back at you from every shelf. If only Russ Meyer had lived to see that day. Top Cow had a whole line of such comic heroines and for a while seemed to be riding on the shoulders of these gals’ already strained backs. The Magdalena looks to be one of the more clothed of this brand of comic book superheroine, her modesty no doubt a result of her Catholic heritage.

Jenna Dewan is Magdalena!Jenna Dewan, who first gained notice in the criminally overpraised “>Tamara (review) and followed that up with the Kevin Smith fave Step Up, will headline the film to be produced by Gale Anne Hurd’s Valhalla Motion Pictures, Platinum Studios, and, naturally, Top Cow Productions. Joining her will be Blade II villain Luke Goss, fresh off the stinker that was After Dark Horrorfest 2’s Unearthed, who has signed on to play Kristof, an agent sent by the secret organization that has been the guardian of the lineage. In other words, he’s “Giles” to Dewan’s “Buffy”. Though I suspect there will be more sexual tension in this version.

Both Dewan and Goss will be attending the Comic-Con in San Diego this weekend where they’ll be promoting Magdalena as part of Top Cow’s panel.

I’ll be very curious to see if this movie gets a theatrical release or ends up going straight-to-DVD. Either way, given the potential Da Vinci Code-esque set-up and depending on just how scantily clad Dewan will be in the lead role, I’m sure William Donahue is already preparing to mount a protest.

The Foywonder

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  • X-Count

    It’ll be theatrical and it’ll piss off a lot of Catholics. I’m almost counting on that. Got the comics, one of Top Cow’s ballsiest ones.