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Dread Central's Best and Worst of 2013





Buz "Danger" Wallick's Picks

Dread Central's Best and Worst of 2013

Evil Dead (2013)5) EVIL DEAD ’13 - What can I say about the Evil Dead remake that hasn’t already been said? This was one of the most entertaining filmgoing experiences I’ve ever had. I squealed with joy every time a face was ripped away or an arm cut off. And by the end, right when my brain was thinking, “Man, this movie is gory...” IT STARTED TO RAIN GODDAMN BLOOD! It was glorious. So very glorious.

4) GRABBERS - I love monster movies. I also love movies that make you feel like you’re on a bender. Grabbers is both of those things, along with sexy Irish accents. The basic premise is these monsters that crave human blood attack this small Irish community, and they discover that if they are drunk, the monsters won’t attack them because the alcohol is poison to them. Yes. It is just as awesome as you imagine it is. Seriously, I LOVED this movie. It’s streaming on Netflix, so watch it.

3) MANIAC - Those that know me well know that I am not a huge fan of slasher flicks. They don’t scare me, and I find them rather tedious. And to be honest I have only seen the original Maniac once, and besides a few moments I found the experience as a whole to be tedious. That was not the case with the remake. No only did it disturb me to my core, I couldn’t stop thinking about it afterwards. I even called my girlfriend an hour after seeing the movie and telling her she wasn’t allowed to walk alone in LA anymore. Which is another reason I loved it so much; how LA centric it was. Very few movies capture the shitty grime and glamour of Los Angeles and MANIAC ’13 nailed it.

2) RESOLUTION - Haven’t heard of this movie? What are you waiting for? GET ON NETFLIX AND WATCH IT NOW! Resolution is a simple yet complex horror film that made my skin crawl. And it does what few horror films do nowadays: present interesting characters you WANT to see make it. There are so many movies that have interesting concepts but fail because the characters are so one-dimensional. RESOLUTION knocks this out of the park, and thanks to a recommendation from Andrew Kasch, it is one of my favorite movies of the year.

1) THE LAST OF US - What’s this? A video game on a best movies of the year list? Yeah, I don’t care; The Last of Us was better than any movie this year by a large margin. Not saying that all movies this year were bad or anything, that’s just how good THE LAST OF US is. I was so compelled by the story of TLOU that I started to just play the game in order to progress the story and get to the next cut scene (which when all cut together makes for a riveting 6-hour movie you can find on YouTube). It was also the first time I ever became emotionally upset if I accidentally got my character(s) killed. I was so attached to them that it was horrifying to me to see them harmed in any way. Playing as Joel, I HAD to protect Ellie, at all costs. I truly felt those stakes. If you haven’t played this game, for the love of God get out there and do it. I bought a PS3 just to play this game and it was worth every penny. THE LAST OF US gets best of everything for 2013.

HONORABLE MENTIONS:
BIG ASS SPIDER! and CONTRACTED are definitely owed some love. Both are great movies that you can watch on VOD if you haven’t yet. Seriously, these movies ROCK.

And honestly, WAKE IN FRIGHT would have been my number one movie of the year because I just watched it on Netflix a few weeks ago. However, it came out 30 years ago so it doesn’t work for 2013. That being said, it’s on Netflix streaming so you must see this movie. It’s incredible.

Dread Central's Best and Worst of 2013

I need to preface the following list by pointing out that I do my absolute best to avoid bad movies. I hate watching bad movies, I hate paying for them, I hate wasting my time. So with that being said, I didn’t see a whole lot of bad stuff. Which is why you will only see 4 things on this list. The bad things I did see though pissed me off something mighty because I wasted my time on it. Thus, they will incur my wrath (or a strongly worded article three people might read).

Pacific Rim (2013)4) PACIFIC RIM - Yep. You all knew this was going to be on my list. When I first came out of the theater, I was just mildly frustrated that it wasn’t as good as I thought it was going to be. Then I really started to think about it and break down what was wrong. That’s when I realized there was only one scene in the entire movie that I liked, the rest was just me desperately trying to like the rest or me becoming enraged that the bad human performances were being thrown in my face in so-so 3D. I just can’t. The movie is a mess and is one of the single worst scripts I’ve seen in a theatrical release in years. It’s an embarrassment to the Kaiju genre (something I love very much).

If you like it, great! I really don’t care. But don’t you dare try and sit there and tell me the acting, writing, or direction is anything more than utter shit.

3) THE HAUNTING IN CONNECTICUT: GHOSTS OF GEORGIA - Why? Why was this made? Why did I watch it? Why write anything else about this vapid sorry excuse for a horror movie? WAIT. Katee Sackoff was great. That answers question number two. The rest of the film is pure nonsensical garbage.

2) "SUPERNATURAL" EPISODE 9.04 - "SLUMBER PARTY" - I adore "Supernatural." Two badass dudes ride around in a sweet muscle car, listen to classic rock, and battle evil. Seriously, it’s one of my favorite shows on television. And while there have been some bad episodes here and there, the good far outweighs the bad. And then this episode happened.

Holy shit.

Firstly, I can’t stand Felicia Day's character, “Charlie,” so that’s strike number 1. But then to make this whole terrible story about the real Dorthy and the land of Oz....blah blah holy Christ, it’s terrible. Remember when I said "Supernatural" is one of my favorite shows? This episode was so bad that I almost gave up on the entire show. It is the Doublemeat Palace episode of Supernatural. For you non-"Buffy" fans, I’m not changing that reference and you should feel bad for not getting it; now go watch "Buffy."

Luckily the season got back on track a few weeks later, but I will forever remember that episode for being the lowest the show has ever gotten.

Now, speaking of shows that can’t get their shit together...

1) "THE WALKING DEAD" SEASON 3 FINALE - I really wanted to just put the entire last half of Season 3 on here as well as the first half of Season 4; however, a few things kept me from doing that. One being everyone else's weepy hurt feelings whenever I criticize their precious show and I didn’t want to offend their delicate sensibilities (they’re already going to cry foul when they see Pacific Rim up there), and two that there were a few genuine cool moments... not many, but a few.

That being said, no one can defend the third season finale, in which the writers and showrunners LOST THEIR GODDAMN MINDS.

The Governor, having run out of cool leather vests to wear I’m assuming, decides to attack the prison with his merry band of Woodbury sheep. They have assault rifles and grenade launchers. Then two people start shooting at them (a group of 30+ people armed to the teeth) and The Governor and the rest of his flock decide to escape the terrifying counter attack of a skinny Asian dude and his girlfriend. I cannot believe that this was acceptable to anyone at AMC. It’s embarrassing.

Oh, and I haven’t even mentioned them killing off television's most poorly written character in a desperate attempt to gain fan forgiveness. A death that meant absolutely nothing. NOTHING. No great sacrifice, no saving the day. Just not being able to pick up some pliers in time. What a load of horseshit.

This single episode of television was so bad that they spent the first half of the next season trying to correct it.

[Andrew Kasch]

[Anthony Arrigo]

[Brad McHargue]

[Buz "Danger" Wallick]

[Debi "The Woman in Black" Moore]

[The Foywonder]

[Gareth "Pestilence" Jones]

[Jinx]

[MattFini]

[Scott "Doctor Gash" Hallam]

[Staci Layne Wilson]

[Uncle Creepy]


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I loved grabbers! i cant believe more people dont have that in their top, nicely shot and a bit of fun!Gotta have warm bodies there too just for that "something different" appeal, new look on zombies going for the relationship thing, twas funny too, kinda like a take on shaun of the dead


Submitted by aries11 on Sun, 01/26/2014 - 8:38pm.

A new Zombie film short called the first wave might be what your looking for, just saw this on io9, http://io9.com/what-happens-after-medicine-finds-a-way-to-fight-the-zo-1... , its like a kinda cure movie i think, with like a new take on what happens after the zombies are cured? check it out anyway, it looks nicely shot


Submitted by zom6 on Sun, 01/26/2014 - 9:43pm.
Cash Bailey's picture

My overall favourite movie of 2013 was easily THE WORLD'S END. A perfect capper to a flawless trilogy.

Worst movie of the year may be SILENT HILL: REVELATION. Michael J. Bassett seems like a really nice guy and a technically solid director, but he can't write for shit.


Submitted by Cash Bailey on Sun, 01/26/2014 - 1:13am.
GODFLESH69's picture

Skarkboy that's cool I thought Elysium delivered Pac Rim while a visual feast when you could see what was going on( i didn't fork out the extra coin for IMAX ) didn't deliver the goods when it came to the Kaiju & Jaeger battles the other Jaegers were just dispatched so quickly we didn't really get to see them do much or really care about their pilots and to me the Kaiju designs were not really that interesting way too similiar this had so much potential to be EPIC but what i got was alot of filler bad writing and annoying characters putting off the tone of the film way too much comic relief to my liking for a film supposed to be about mankinds last stand against extinction. I grew up on Godzilla & ULTRAMAN i can only hope Godzilla 2014 delivers more but not too optimistic given the director, MONSTERS was a bore. That's what makes us individuals though and like to hear other's opinions even though they don't reflect my own all the time,enjoy .


Submitted by GODFLESH69 on Sat, 01/04/2014 - 12:34pm.
MonsterMash's picture

Monsters is boring. It put me to sleep, and I can count on one hand the number of movies that have done that to me. As far as I'm concerned, It's gonna be a good fan film. Toho and monster in suit is where it's at. I'm excited, but the best Godzilla movies have already been made. As for your rejection towards Pacific Rim, I suggest that you merely saw the Asylum mockbuster, and not the raw cinematic carnage that the rest of us enjoyed.


Submitted by MonsterMash on Sat, 01/04/2014 - 5:30pm.
aliensharkboy's picture

So you're complaining about Pacific Rim's cinematography being unbearably shaky, but not Elysium's? I completely get your other complaints (not that I agree with them), but that's a new one!
You must truly hate Michael Bay's Transformer films.

See, I found the filler to be perfectly adequate and fun; similar in structure to most old Kaiju movies (even the climax resembled the end of some of the Mechagodzilla movies).
I thought del Toro's well designed glossy production, harmless sense of humour, and fun mix of cheesy characters made for the perfect string to tie the big battle set-pieces together. It's not trying to be more than it knows it is, and I respected that. Plus, that freakin' soundtrack generates some serious eargasms.

And no worries, Monsters may have been a bore (though I kinda loved it), but it certainly had atmosphere. I think Gareth Edwards will do a fine job of mirroring the original Godzilla's darker tones (in which case, you'd get a proper "mankinds last stand against extinction" vibe).


Submitted by aliensharkboy on Sat, 01/04/2014 - 1:03pm.
Rob's picture

Best (in no particular order)

You're Next
Pacific Rim
The Conjuring
Evil Dead
V/H/S 2

And special shout-out to NBC's Hannibal. Bring on Season 2!

I actually don't have a worst list, because none of the other movies I saw I really disliked, those being Carrie (I thought Chloe, Gabriella Wilde and Judy Greer kept it from being abysmal), Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters (which was just fun), and No One Lives, which was dumb as hell but it didn't bug me though I think the main actress was horrendous. Actually I would've rather seen a back-story movie about Luke Evans and Laura Ramsey's characters than the actual movie. But those were the only other films I saw.


Submitted by Rob on Sat, 01/04/2014 - 12:28am.

My Top films

1. The Seasoning House - I would put this top for much the same reason as 12 years A lave. A disturbing look at the sexual violence commited against youing girls in conflict zones, in this case the worst acts of genocide since WW2 during the 1990's Blakans War. That it manages to portray these events so realistically and brutally within the context of a suspensefull thriller is a testament its director, Paul Hyett. Truely incredible performance by Rosie Day as Anglel aswell

2. Stoker - I never got the love for OldBoy but watching this in the cinema was one of the most surprising and enyoyable movie expereinces of 2013.

3. Pacific Rim - I know that yes, the characters are underdeveloped and cliche, the story ain the most complex but dammit Del Toro TOTALLY knocks it out of the park with the robot v monster scenes with his signature and mesmirizing visual style combining excellently with the fight scene's sense of scale. Brought out the 10 year old kid in me.

4. American Mary - At times explicit but equally smart, sexy and darkly humorous the Soska Sister’s have followed up their Dead Hooker’s In a Trunk with a masterpiece. Incorporating a broader female revenge narrative arc with more complex concepts of body modification and perceptions of beauty they have, however, created a quite intriguing story and character in Katherine Isabelle’s Mary Mason.

5. Dark Touch - In the same year that the Carrie remake came out another superior film with elements of Carrie snuck in largely unnoticed. Though other elements of the film are not perfect its damning and underlying themesof child abuse are as powerfull as the main characters subsequent manifestaion of telekitnic poers

6. Byztanium - I admit I have never seen Interview with a vampire or In The Coimpany of Wolves but I was pleasently surprised with this film due to the lukewarm reviews i previously heard. Among its strenghs were its beautifull look, engaging and well played characters and an interesting and quite original narrative in vampire terms.

7. We Are What We Are - Another example of how to succesfully do a remake respect the original but bring your own ideas to the tableable.Jim Mickle did just that with this.

8. Contracted - A quite impressive little indie film I caught at frightfest.

9. Frankenstein's Army - Extremely imaginative creature design made up for the films drawbacks in other elements. A true sight on the big screen.

Bottom

Texas Chainsaw 3D - 5 minutes in - I was thinking, where the hell did all these extra guys in the house come from?, 10 minutes in, very bored, 15 minutes in - turned it off.

Evil Dead - not a bad film but very forgettable. Beyond the gore, the original was both scary, creepy and blackly comic in parts. The remake is none of these things. The only reaction I got from it was that it was gross, like Hostel or the later Saw sequels are gross but in no way horrifying. I can apprieciate the work that went into the practical effects and I admit the characters and story were mildly interesting but, as I say, where the original was succesfully creepy and blackly comic this has no unique character because it treats its characters and story so seriously while amping up the gore.


Submitted by Hicks on Fri, 01/03/2014 - 2:59pm.
GODFLESH69's picture

just watched Byztanium was solid and Gemma Arterton is easy to look at damn she's fine!!!


Submitted by GODFLESH69 on Sun, 01/05/2014 - 11:21pm.

Forgot to add Sleep Tight aswell. That is an excellent film aswell. The Seasoning House would still be top though. Portrays the disgusting and tragic acts that really happened in real life to these girls very well. To pull back on its depiction would be a disservice to the real life victims. Same thing might be happening in Syria now.


Submitted by Hicks on Fri, 01/03/2014 - 3:40pm.

Corrections

*12 Years A Slave
*Angel
*Table


Submitted by Hicks on Fri, 01/03/2014 - 3:32pm.
frank_dracman's picture

So you missed the best part of Texas Chainsaw, the magic shirt! Go get 'em, cuz!


Submitted by frank_dracman on Fri, 01/03/2014 - 3:17pm.
moderator That shirt was fucking
Steve Barton's picture

That shirt was fucking tenacious!


Submitted by Steve Barton on Fri, 01/03/2014 - 3:27pm.
frank_dracman's picture

Yes! That DFF made me laugh out loud. Stupid movie but it gave you guys some great material.


Submitted by frank_dracman on Fri, 01/03/2014 - 4:28pm.

I hated that shirt!
She must have had her nipples glued to it or something


Submitted by will graham on Fri, 01/03/2014 - 4:21pm.

she just had perfect nipple placement.


Submitted by Chernobyl Kinsman on Fri, 01/03/2014 - 4:55pm.
lol

lol


Submitted by will graham on Fri, 01/03/2014 - 5:45pm.
aliensharkboy's picture

Off the top of my head, I'd say the best (that've been covered on DC) are:

10: The Hunger Games: Catching Fire
9: Grabbers
8: The World's End
7: Curse of Chucky
6: V/H/S/2
5: Evil Dead (2013)
4: Maniac
3: Prisoners
2: Gravity
1: Pacific Rim

Honorable mentions would probably be American Mary, This Is The End, Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters, and Riddick.

As for the worst (I haven't hated much this year - even the first 2 on this list I don't entirely dislike. I suppose I enjoy too many movies):

6: Aftershock
5: World War Z
4: After Earth
3: Elysium
2: Oblivion
1: Texas Chainsaw 3D

Not covered by DC, but Man Of Steel gets first place alongside Texas Chainsaw 3D.


Submitted by aliensharkboy on Fri, 01/03/2014 - 2:48pm.

I really liked grabbers too, the colour/grading on it is really nice, a good watch, Prisoners was really good too, nice bit of tension all the way through, puts you in everyones shoes, well made!


Submitted by zom6 on Sun, 01/26/2014 - 5:15pm.
aliensharkboy's picture

Grabbers is indeed very awesome. I've yet to encounter someone who genuinely dislikes it (though by saying that I'm sure someone will come out and say it soon).
But Prisoners was incredible man! Haven't experienced a thriller so gripping and moody in atmosphere since Se7en. I tell you those 153 minutes went by real smoothly. Too bad it didn't get more recognition at the Oscars.


Submitted by aliensharkboy on Mon, 01/27/2014 - 7:09pm.
GODFLESH69's picture

Sharkboy 5 on your top 10 aren't even horror !!! I would switch Pac Rim job with Elysium dont get the hate for that flick it's a sci fi classic to me anyways but whatever floats your boat.


Submitted by GODFLESH69 on Fri, 01/03/2014 - 2:55pm.
aliensharkboy's picture

I know they weren't necessarily horror, but DC covered them, so I figured that still counts, right?

And nah, Elysium was a nauseating experience, and way too pretentious for my likings. Over hyped. I much preferred District 9.

And I totally get the hate for Specific Rim. All the arguments are valid. I just don't agree with them - probably cos I have the biggest soft spot for Kaiju films. It set out to be an awesome visual feast of a kaiju movie, and accomplished just that!


Submitted by aliensharkboy on Fri, 01/03/2014 - 3:07pm.

I agree with Pacific Rim. I didnt go into it expecting a oscar winning story or well developed characters, I went into hoping it would deliver on its main draw of massive robots fighting monsters. And boy did it deliver in that regard. Gutted I missed it in Theatres as I was put off by the many bad reviews.


Submitted by Hicks on Fri, 01/03/2014 - 3:45pm.
frank_dracman's picture

Glad I'm not the only one who thought Elysium was garbage. It was as subtle as a Miley Cyrus video and Damon only has one setting- boring. We wanted it to be good, but man did it misfire.


Submitted by frank_dracman on Fri, 01/03/2014 - 3:13pm.

Newp, Elysium was pretty fucking terrible. Also I started thinking 'Hey this is a bit like Johnny Mnemonic' BEFORE they had the whole data in the head thing.

That girl talking to him about the hippo with the bird on its back or whatever, what the shit was that? I literally couldn't believe what I was hearing.


Submitted by Chernobyl Kinsman on Sat, 01/04/2014 - 1:30am.
frank_dracman's picture

Did someone say Johnny Mnemonic?! I know it's a dumb movie but damned if I don't love it. Dina Meyer is stupid hot and it's got Henry Rollins, Takeshi Kitano AND Lundgren? How is this not a cult classic? I know what I'm watching tonight. Thanks, dude!


Submitted by frank_dracman on Sat, 01/04/2014 - 9:34am.

Hah, yeah, its stupid but I have a huge soft spot for it as well.


Submitted by Chernobyl Kinsman on Sat, 01/04/2014 - 2:43pm.
aliensharkboy's picture

RICH = BAD. POOR = GOOD. One of the only films I actually tried to sleep through in order to avoid feeling sick (due to the shaky-cam). Unbearable.


Submitted by aliensharkboy on Fri, 01/03/2014 - 9:30pm.
frank_dracman's picture

Oh man, I totally forgot about that horrendous shaky cam. That movie is all kinds of forgettable.

Bilbo, Frodo, Dildo, Sleepy or Doc. I really don't care at all about those movies. Bilbo must be the main Hobbit in the new movies, hence my brain fart.


Submitted by frank_dracman on Fri, 01/03/2014 - 10:52pm.

dildo sleepy and doc hahahahaha lol


Submitted by zom6 on Sun, 01/26/2014 - 5:17pm.

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