Killer Mermaid (2014)
Foywonder
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Starring Kristina Klebe, Franco Nero, Natalie Burn, Dragan Mićanović, Miodrag Krstović, Slobodan Stefanović, Sofija Rajović, Zorana Kostić Obradović
Directed by Milan Todorovic
Geez, just look at the number of names I’ve listed above that end in the suffix “vic.” You should see the rest of the credits.
Speaking of spelling, since American audiences need everything spelled out for them, it seems this new killer mermaid flick originally titled Nymph has been given the more simplistic, straight-to-the-point title Killer Mermaid. While not without its flaws, this Serbian sea monster movie deserves a better moniker than the dopey new Syfy-ish title would imply.
Two American women are on vacation in scenic Montenegro. Well, one American woman and an actress playing an American who clearly struggles at times to mask her natural Russian accent.
Just the lush Balkan locale alone adds an exotic flavor that elevates the production past most low-budget creature features these days. It’s not a location we typically see on screen, particularly in horror movies, so I’d definitely say it speaks volumes that even after watching people horribly killed by both madman and monster, it still looked like a place I’d love to visit.
Kelly is a workaholic magazine writer who has issues with the ocean stemming from a childhood tragedy. I’m thinking if you suffer from a touch of aquaphobia, vacationing in a seaside Mediterranean resort town is probably not your best bet.
Her BFF Lucy looks incredible in a bikini. That’s not just me being lecherous; that really is about all we ever get to know about her. That and she’s still not entirely over her college boyfriend, Serbian playboy Alex, with whom the two are reuniting in this aquatic paradise. Alex has brought with him the fiancée he’s not sure he’s ready to fully commit to so you better believe that leads to some romantic entanglements.
Another handsome stranger joins them as they consider taking a trip out to Mamula, a small island that’s home to an abandoned military prison. When has that not ever ended badly in a movie?
The great Franco Nero doesn’t get nearly enough screen time as a grizzled fisherman, kind of like Quint to the mermaid’s Jaws. He attempts to warn the vacationers that Mamula is a place of great evil they’d be wise to stay far away from. Naturally, they do not listen. If they had, the movie would have been a 30-minute postcard.
Once on Mamula, the solid set-up gets bogged down as the attractive ne’er-do-wells are stalked by a mad fisherman whose primary weapon of choice is a four-pronged boat anchor. Comparisons to I Know What You Did Last Summer were not lost on the writers, who even make a joke referencing that film. I’m tempted to summarize the movie as I Know What You Did Last Summer meets Splash if Daryl Hannah’s siren song turned Tom Hanks into a hook-wielding homicidal maniac.
Perhaps the title should have been changed to Killer/Mermaid or Killer & Mermaid since the mermaid herself is a tad underutilized. Her maniacal minion does most of the legwork, most likely because the mermaid has no legs. The clunky slasher aspect kills a lot of momentum with tunnel chases that go on far too long. I prefer more mermaid and less killer in my killer mermaid movies.
A major opportunity is missed as the siren’s mind-controlling call appeared to be on the verge of transforming Alex into another maniacal minion, only to never really follow through with it. Given the romantic insecurities the subplots are built around, having these men take turns falling under the spell of another woman and turning on their female counterparts could have added an extra layer of both subtext and suspense to all the running and chasing that makes up too much of the mid-section.
A few less-than-convincing CGI shots aside, the mermaid is portrayed by a beautiful half-naked actress who perfectly conveys the seductive side of this mythological predator before she reveals her true face that only an alligator could love. Again, underutilized, as she doesn’t even make a full appearance until nearly the halfway point, and it won’t be until the final 15 minutes that she actually starts getting her fins dirty.
A mix of Hammer-esque horror and slasher filmdom that transforms into a full-blown creature feature by the end, pacing and story issues aside, it is a notch above most modern low-budget monster movies that tend to also be low on ambition or resources. Killer Mermaid is a Gothic creature feature dripping with atmosphere, sex appeal, and blood. But a little more mermaid action and a lot more Franco Nero really would have helped it make a bigger splash.
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Film
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