Your digital horror offerings for September 12th, 2006 shall include…
That is the question posed by this Lionsgate release that essentially rips off their own money printing series, Saw. Instead of adults in peril, we get teens for this movie for some reason, and instead of a killer with clear motivations, we get a jumbled mess of badly delivered excuses for death. It doesn’t help that the victims are all morons, too, people you will likely cheer for the death of moments after they first appear on screen. Check out The Foywonder’s review of it here for more criticism! Buy it here!
Here’s another good example of why crime doesn’t pay. Or at least being a vicious killer doesn’t pay. Or if it does pay, it costs more than … ah, forget it. The tale is of three vicious killers who choose to take refuge from their latest killing spree in a quiet suburban home and are willing to kill anyone in their way. Unfortunately they meet their psychopathic match with the titular character, a crazy old aunt locked away in the attic, and she’s even more crazy and ready to kill than they are. Check out Creepy’s review for more! Buy it here!
Image takes the initiative and finally puts this long sought after Shaw Brothers horror feature onto DVD for the first time. In it, a young couple are tormented by a sexy widow who has consulted a necromancer to cast a love spell on the object of her affections. The ‘mancer, however, has plans of his own for the bride-to-be, and by the end two magicians are pitted against one another in a battle of the magics. Buy it here!
Wow, Christopher Lee in a vampire movie? What brilliant casting! Who would’ve thunk it. A young woman is forced to stay at the castle of Count Karnstein, who believes his daughter Laura is sick physically, when in fact her nurse thinks she’s possessed by the spirit of her dead ancestor, Camilla. Soon the girl stuck at the castle becomes convinced the spirit is forcing Laura to kill … and I’m sure vampires have something to do with it, considering the title. Buy it here!
Some teens on their way to a rock concert run out of gas in the middle of nowhere. They manage to find a lone house, where they try and steal some gas so they can make it to the show on time, but the resident of said house doesn’t take kindly to having his gas stolen and goes all stalk-n-slash on ‘em. Apparently it’s not very good, as if that’s any surprise with a title like Dark Fields, but don’t take my word for; read The Foywonder’s review for the full lowdown. Buy it here!
How is it that one man could make something as disturbing and wince-inducing as Audition and then a few years later make one of the best kids’ films I’ve ever seen? You don’t see any U.S. directors anywhere close to Miike’s caliber, that’s for damn sure. The story is of a boy caught in the middle of the titular war, in which all sorts of ancient Japanese monsters are forced to fight against their evil and twisted counterparts. I’ll leave it up to Andrew’s review to explain more, but to put it simply: See this movie! Buy it here!
Alex is having some issues. He’s getting smarter everyday, able to read books by simply flipping the pages and figuring out chess games without even moving the pieces, but as his intelligence increases, so do the deaths around him, which become more and more violent. It all comes down to some monsters which may or may not be real (but have funny looking noses either way) and some seriously fucked up head games. Check out my review of the film here for more! Buy it here!
Wow, remember this movie? The gay-themed slasher that was made a somewhat big deal of when it first came out? I had completely forgotten about it since I though it hit DVD a while ago, but I guess I was wrong. See? It does happen sometimes. Anyway, the film starts off with a gay couple making out in the park who are interrupted by a serial killer. The following night the serial killer sets his eye on another gay couple, and a night of gay-themed terror ensues. Like so many of mine as of late… Buy it here!
A movie about an ugly duckling who becomes a beautiful swan (by removing her glasses) and gets revenge on all those who wrong her. Not a single mention of any boys sans shirt like you would expect from DeCoteau, but then that’s just the sort of thing he’d spring on an unsuspecting male audience. How Foy manages to get all these so early I’m not sure, but he reviewed this one for a while back, so make sure you click here to read about it before you rush out and buy it. Buy it here!
Wow, I guess Tarantino’s efforts to revitalize David Carradine’s career with Kill Bill were for naught as he more than likely has a glorified cameo in this cliché-ridden film about a woman being lulled into a coven of lesbian vampires. Seriously, though, are there any other kind? While I’m sure we can hope for some hot girl-on-girl action to make it watchable, something tells me it’s just not going to deliver in that department. Buy it here!
This appears to be a somewhat decent ghost story that revolves around a Fillipino maid who is hired by a family in Singapore. As her luck would have it, the first time she’s away from home and she manages to show up in a city right on the day the gates of hell are open for 30 days, which happens on the seventh month of every year. Spirits both good and bad start plaguing her night and day, and pretty soon she’s questioning her own reality. Buy it here!
Hooper’s entry for the first season of Masters was an inspired work, ambitious to the point the other episodes never really tried to be. It takes place in a post-World War III time, in which the streets are no longer safe near the big city. One mother does everything she can to shelter her daughter from the outside world, but teenagers are precocious, and pretty soon she’s learning some pretty horrible truths about her family. Check out Debi’s DVD review for more! Buy it here!
A lost horror film from Brian DePalma? So says the box for Something Weird’s release of Murder, which deals with a girl who discovers that her boyfriend is making skin flicks on the side. Believing he’s only doing it to make enough money to divorce his wife (riiiight), she starts stealing for him but meets a nasty man with an ice pick. Finger tells of what happens when some beatniks find a bank robber holed up in the basement of their coffee house. Buy it here!
Wow, what an original concept! Some contestants on a reality show get more than they bargained for when things turn deadly and their numbers decrease one by one. You see, the twist is that they already succeeded one reality show, now they’ve been gathered together for a “reunion” on an island, only when they get there they discover no crew and a very vicious killer. While it’d be cool to think that it’s a monster stalking them, because that’s how my head works, it’s probably just some disgruntled TV producer. Buy it here!
Wow, someone must’ve seen more potential in this movie than anyone else to give it a balls-out 2-disc special edition just a few short months after its single-disc edition debuted. What the hell is so special about this version? Well, the behind-the-scenes doc is longer, there’s some new deleted scenes, a featurette or two, and it contains an isolated score track. Wow. I guess we should be thankful to Media Blasters? Check out Andy’s review of the film for a slightly different perspective. Buy it here!
An interesting collection of two of the better King adaptations and one of the worst. Specifically this set includes Frank Darabont’s The Shawshank Redemption, possibly one of the best movies ever made, Stanley Kubrick’s The Shining, which I still think is overloved, and (ugh) Dreamcatcher. That last one, in case you couldn’t guess, is the one I refer to as one of the worst. My God, is it bad. Anyway, this set is a good warm-up for the new King collection due out on the 26th which features SE’s of Pet Semetary and The Dead Zone. Buy it here!
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