What do you get the person who has everything? You get him or her a goddamn Human Centipede hand-knit scarf, that’s what! Made of 12 (count ’em 12!) victims (thank you, Martin!) The Human Centipede scarf may be the greatest piece of outerwear ever created.
Do yourself a favor and head over to Etsy.com, the world’s handmade marketplace, and pick up one of these beauties. Yes, they are a bit on the expensive side, but come on; this is a one-of-a-kind item that’s made to your specifications. You aren’t just going to stroll into Old Navy and pick up a Human Centipede scarf. Not happening.
If it ever drops below 50 degrees in New York (maybe they’re onto something with this global warming thing), I’m all over this. You need the ‘pede! Treat yourself.
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