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High Cost of Body Parts Got You Down? Join the Repo Men Union

I know, man. Spare body parts nowadays are costing an arm and a leg. Literally. Thanks to the upcoming theatrical release of Repo Men, there’s a new Union you can join to lessen the blow to your pockets!

Directed by Miguel Sapochnik and starring Jude Law, Forest Whitaker, Liev Schreiber, RZA, Alice Braga, and Carice van Houten, Repo Men arrives in theaters April 2, 2010. Read on for more about The Union!

At The Union we pride ourselves on providing the world’s most cutting-edge technology in organ replacement. Artiforgs – short for artificial organs — were originally developed to extend the lives of soldiers wounded in combat. We’ve taken this once-exclusive military technology and made it accessible to the general public. Thanks to our team of skilled scientists and technicians, you, too, can extend and enhance your life by purchasing your very own artiforg.

To learn more about the one-stop shop for all your artiforg needs, please go to TheUnionCares.com. The website will guide you through their complete catalog of artiforg offerings, as well as an overview of financing and payment plans*.

Don’t delay – the key to extending and enhancing your life is just a few steps away…

Or, if you are interested in joining The Union team, please consider applying for a position directly on the website. The Union is currently looking for skilled and licensed technicians with the following skills to join their team of Repo Men:

  • 5+ years experience in the military, law enforcement, or security work
  • Must excel in hand-to-hand combat
  • Proficiency in one or more of the following: mixed martial arts, karate, kung fu, judo, jujitsu, kickboxing
  • Adept at handling both tasers and scalpels
  • *Financing Terms and Conditions: Action will be taken after the sixth day of the fourth month of non-payment. Repo Men will retrieve the property at your own expense.

    High Cost of Body Parts Got You Down? Join the Repo Men Union

    High Cost of Body Parts Got You Down? Join the Repo Men Union

    Uncle Creepy

    VISIT THE EVILSHOP @ AMAZON!
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    Repo things in the Dread Central forums.

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    Steve Barton

    You're such an inspiration for the ways that I will never, ever choose to be.