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DVD Release List: Altered Wicker

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Some good stuff lies in wait for you come December 19th, 2006…

Click to see it bigger!Altered (2006)
Directed by Ed Sanchez

Long promised to be a theatrical release from Rogue, apparently despite their hip “newness” they’re just as ready to screw over filmmakers as any other studio is. Ed Sanchez, one half of the team behind the original Blair Witch, finally returns with this tale of friends who seek to enact revenge on the alien captors who took one of their own 15 years previous. They manage to capture one of the aliens and dish out some payback, but that’s a door that swings both ways. Check our DVD review for more! Buy it here!


Click to see it bigger!Cannibal (2006)
Directed by Marian Dora

Based on the true story of a German man who put up an ad online looking for someone to eat and actually got a willing donor, Cannibal is about as dull a cannibal movie as you can ask for. In the first third there are a lot of close-ups of faces and lips, the second there’s a lot of man love, and the third is just a long, drawn out gutting of a human body. Yeah, it gets extreme, but it’s shot and edited in such a way as to make the whole package rather dull. Check out my DVD review for more. Buy it here!


Click to see it bigger!Hideshi Hino’s Theater of Horror
Directed by Various

Now that’s what I’m talking about; six full-length films based on the works of Hideshi Hino, one of Japan’s most influential manga creators. His rainbow-colored, flesh filled imaginings have haunted the small island for decades, making many a film director desire to adapt his work to moving picture. Included in this set are Lizard Baby, Death Train, Ravaged House: Zoroku’s Disease, The Boy From Hell, Dead Girl Walking, and Occult Detective Club: Doll Cemetery! Buy it here!


Click to see it bigger!Long Distance (2005)
Directed by Marcus Stern

Now this movie should teach you, if nothing else, to always double check the number you’re calling before you dial. A lonely young woman doesn’t bother with this and accidentally dials a phone number wrong by one digit, catching a serial killer in the middle of a serial killing. He latches onto her voice and begins to call her every time he kills, moving closer and closer to her Boston home. Why couldn’t it have been a telemarketer, damnit? Buy it here!


Click to see it bigger!Nezulla the Rat Monster (2002)
Directed by Kanta Tagawa

I wish you guys had any idea the amount of work and time that goes into these lists each week; inevitably I come across a title with either artwork, year of production, or director information that is nowhere to be found and sometimes hours worth of searching ensues. And you know who is usually to blame? Media Blasters. Why can’t they just keep their site up-to-date? Anyway, this film is about a giant rat/human hybrid that is the result of a scientific experiment gone very wrong. Terror ensues. Buy it here!


Click to see it bigger!Spirit Trap (2005)
Directed by David Smith

So this is what Billie Piper is doing after her time traveling the universe with Dr. Who? Wow, how noble of her. I tried to make sense of the synopsis I found on IMDB, but it seems like it was translated badly from another language. The film has something to do with students who are offered lodging in an old house. One of them is psychic and a spirit clock is fixed which causes people to die but the psychic sees it first and they all confess to having killed someone before and now they can’t get out. Yeah, that’s about how much sense it made to me, too. Buy it here!


Click to see it bigger!The Wicker Man (1973)
Directed by Robin Hardy

Just to make sure ignorant consumers are nice and confused, Anchor Bay decided to re-release this 2-disc Wicker Man the same day as the 2006 version starring Nicolas Cage hits DVD. I’m sure most buyers will be able to tell the difference, but I bet they’re banking on more than one misinformed sale. Features on this edition include new commentary by Hardy on the extended version of the film along with Chris Lee, Ed Woodward, and Mark Kermode. Check out our DVD review for more! Buy it here!


Click to see it bigger!The Wicker Man (2006)
Directed by Neil LaBute

I’ve heard some really terrible thing said about this new version of Robin Hardy’s underrated classic, but I’ve also heard people saying it was better than it had any right to be. I guess it’s all about perception with films like this, the original such a hit-or-miss with fans in general. Nic Cage stars as a traumatized cop who travels to an island ruled by women in search of a young girl who reminds him a bit too much of a girl he saw die years before. A big man made of wicker comes into play, in case the title didn’t give you any hints. Buy it here!


Click to see it bigger!Zombie Nation (2005)
Directed by Uli Lomel

Where the hell did Uli Lommel come from again all of a sudden? Years of silence and then out of nowhere he’s got a slew of new movies coming out left and right. Must’ve found some source of funding. The fact that they’re direct-to-DVD releases from Lionsgate does not bode well for their quality, however, but then neither does the fact that they’re directed by Uli Lommel. The story is about some voodoo priestesses who resurrect the dead to take down a serial killing cop. Buy it here!


Johnny Butane

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Jesper Kyd Returning to Score Vermintide 2

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From the cover of Kyd's first Vermintide OST

Get your headphones ready, Warhammer fans because State of Decay and Darksiders 2 composer Jesper Kyd is back to score the upcoming Warhammer title Vermintide 2! The game will be coming to PC and consoles early this year.

Kyd was inspired by Norse mythology, utilizing ancient tribal music as well as dark fantastical elements to build upon the acoustic soundscapes he composed for the first Vermintide game. Channeling his own Scandinavian roots, Kyd will blend Viking and Norse-inspired vocals with ritualistic percussion styles to create a unique soundtrack experience.

Three tracks from the score can be heard below.

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Like Me – Will You Like This Dystopian Thriller?

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Starring Addison Timlin, Ian Nelson, Larry Fessenden

Directed by Robert Mockler


While Like Me is not dystopian in the classic science-fiction sense, it does aptly put the downer vibe across. If the present is abysmal, then the future is downright hopeless. We learn this as we follow an unhinged teenage loner called Kiya (Addison Timlin) on a hollow crime spree that she broadcasts on social media. At first the world “likes” her—with the exception of YouTube rival Burt (Ian Nelson), who disdainfully denounces her viral videos—but pride goes before the fall, and Kiya’s descent is spectacular.

If you’ve peeped the trailer for Like Me, then you’re probably expecting a horror movie. I mean, they’ve got the requisite menacing masked baddie and they’ve got genre icon Larry Fessenden in a major role—those are a couple of the key ingredients, right? Yes they are, but this simmering, shimmering stew of Natural Born Killers, Excision and King Kelly, it boils down to a whole lotta nothing. Like Me is sort of a drama, kind of a road trip flick, and almost a thriller. It succeeds at none yet does stand on its own as a compelling collection of cool visuals and pertinent performances. But is that enough?

While Kiya is a compelling character on the surface, there’s barebones beneath. Sure, she’s a Millennial mind-fed on random online clips and snappy soundbites—but what turned her into a psychopath? Was she born that way? Is social media to blame? We’ll never know, because not a hint is given. I don’t mind ambiguity, but even a morsel would have been welcome in this case. As Kiya ramps up her reckless exhibitionistic extremes, the stakes are never raised. In the end, who cares? Maybe that’s the point.

A word of warning: If you plan on watching this movie while chomping snacks…don’t. There is stomach-turning scene after vomit-inducing scene of orgiastic easting, binging, and the inevitable purging. I’m sure it’s all metaphorical mastication, a cutting comment on disposable consumption. I get it. But I don’t wanna look at it, again and again and again. Having said that, Like Me is an experimental film and in its presentation of such grotesquery, it’s quite accomplished. Montages, split-screens and jittered motions are scattered throughout, showing us all sorts of unpleasant things…Kudos to the editor.

I didn’t hate Like Me. But I do think one has to be in the mood for a movie such as this. It’s not an easy or entertaining watch, but it is a peculiar and thought-provoking one. There’s some style and mastery behind the camera, and I am curious to see what first-time writer-director Rob Mockler comes up with next.

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Last Toys on the Left

Funko Giving Jurassic Park the Pop! Treatment as Only They Can

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It is no secret we’re BIG fans of Funko’s Pop! Vinyl line here at DC HQ, and now they’ve announced a new series that has made our hearts just about burst… read on for a look at Pop! Movies: Jurassic Park, heading our way in February. The regular figures are awesome on their own, but wait until you see the exclusives!

From the Funko Blog:
Jurassic Park fans, get excited! To celebrate the 25th anniversary of the iconic film’s appearance on the silver screen, Jurassic Park is coming to Pop!

This series of Pop! features paleontologist Dr. Grant, Jurassic Park CEO John Hammond, mathematician Dr. Malcolm, and embryo-smuggler Dennis Nedry. (Keep an eye out for Dr. Ellie Sattler in Pop! Rides coming soon.)

We couldn’t forget the Jurassic Park dinosaurs! Featured in this line are the great T. rex, Velociraptor, and Dilophsaurus. Look for the Dilophosaurus chase, a rarity of 1-in-6.

Be on the lookout for exclusives. At Target you can find a wounded Dr. Malcolm, and the Dennis Nedry and Dilophosaurus 2-pack is available only at Entertainment Earth.

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