Piranhas Eat Jerry O’Connell! World Celebrates!

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Piranhas Eat Jerry O'Connell! World Celebrates!I always get this frat boy poseur vibe from Jerry O’Connell that makes me hate him so much. Completely irrational hatred; yet the hate feels so real. O’Connell has now joined the cast of the Piranha 3D and that means there’s a good chance he will be eaten alive, which also means I might pay to see the film 100 times.

Entertainment Weekly reports that the former fat kid from Stand By Me who grew up to marry John Stamos’ sloppy seconds and keeps getting his own network sitcoms that consistently suck massive cock and are cancelled after less than a season has signed on to co-star in Alex Aja’s 3D Piranha remake alongside actors and actresses I don’t hate like Elisabeth Shue, Ving Rhames, Richard Dreyfuss, and Dina Meyer.

I have a simple rule: any movie where Jerry O’Connell dies is automatically great regardless of the quality of the rest of the film. O’Connell just appeared in Obsessed. Ali Larter did not kill him. Therefore, for that reason alone, Obsessed was terrible.

The Foywonder

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