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Theory: What If American Horror Story Season 6 Doesn’t Have a Theme?

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The sixth season of FX’s mega popular series “American Horror Story” premieres tonight, and at the time of writing this post, we still have literally no idea what to expect from it. Sure, the network has released over 20 short teaser videos in the past month or so, but if any of them provided any clues, they damn sure went right over our heads. So what’s the top secret theme, you ask?

Well, what if the secret is that there isn’t one?

If there’s any single aspect of “American Horror Story” that makes it different from all other horror shows it’s that each new season tells a brand new story; making it, for all intents and purposes, an anthology series. But what if, taking that concept to the next level, the show’s sixth season is an anthology season within that anthology series? What if, rather than telling one story across one season, the new season takes a page out of the “Tales From the Crypt” playbook and tells 13 individual stories?

I suppose the only way to test out the theory, at this point in time, is to compare it to what we definitely do know about the new season of “American Horror Story.” We’ve been told that the season will be spread across different time periods, past and present, and FX’s CEO also informed us, if we’re to believe anything the network has been feeding us, that many of the 20+ teasers we’ve recently seen were nothing more than misdirects. I’ll allow him to explain that one, in his own words.

I think they’re really fun and funny and beautifully, artfully made,” John Landgraf recently said of the teaser videos. “And a lot of them are accurate. The others are all misdirects.”

If “a lot” of those 20+ teaser videos do paint an accurate picture of “Season 6,” and none of them seem to have that much in common with one another, could it be that a select 13 of those teasers represent the 13 episodes of the sixth season? Could some of those video titles, such as “The Mist,” “The Lesson,” “Lullaby,” and “Sunset Stroll” actually be the individual episode titles? You may remember that several outlets, including TV Guide, listed the new season’s first episode as “American Horror Story: The Mist,” which again seems to corroborate what I’m beginning to think isn’t such a crazy theory.

Maybe “The Mist” isn’t the theme, but merely the premiere episode’s title.

What about those set photos that recently leaked? They suggested that the new season draws some level of inspiration from the real-life Roanoke Colony, but the subsequent teasers seemed to bear almost no resemblance to anything we saw on that set; to the point that most people completely forgot all about those photos. Again, it’s very possible that the set we saw was merely the set for one standalone episode of Season 6, rather than an indication of the season’s theme.

If you think about it, an anthology season of “American Horror Story” would allow Ryan Murphy and company to do what they do best. Not being beholden to telling one story throughout the entire season would potentially allow them to sidestep the most common complaint about the series: the oftentimes poor storytelling. Many viewers seem to tune out within the first few episodes, but the anthology approach would encourage everyone to come back each week. If you don’t like the story one week, there’s always a brand new one headed your way the following week.

Now that’s smart television.

What do you think? Just another crazy fan theory? Sound off below!

American Horror Story Season 6

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Editorials

My Neighbors Are Dead: The Best Horror Podcast You’re Not Listening To

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Halloween has come and gone, but Dread Central readers know that our horror lovin’ doesn’t end once the trick or treaters have gone to bed. Sure, we do go back to being the dastardly death-loving heathens looked down upon by polite society rather than the valuable fountains of horror movie knowledge sought after throughout October, but horror fans are an interesting bunch.

Our fandom is not centered around one specific world like Whovians, Potterheads, or Trekkies but rather a love of a genre that is varied and vast. And if the comments section of any of our articles has taught us anything, it’s that horror fans know just about everything there is to know about horror films. We all know of the heavy hitters like Freddy, Jason, and Leatherface, but what about the other characters that we weren’t privy to meet?

Enter: MY NEIGHBORS ARE DEAD.

My Neighbors Are Dead is a weekly improvised podcast in which host Adam Peacock interviews the lesser-known characters from your favorite horror films. The caterer from Damien’s party in The Omen couldn’t have had great business after serving food at the birthday of the Antichrist. And if you thought the theories in Room 237 were insane, just imagine what the directors pitched that weren’t accepted for the documentary!

Each week host Adam Peacock interviews some of the most skilled improv comics to tell “their side of the story” as unseen characters in our favorite horror films. This podcast is still relatively new, but it’s already been recommended by AV Club, Splitsider, Threadless, and now us. Meaning, if you start listening now, you’ll be able to show off your hipster street cred by knowing them “before they got famous.

Adam Peacock co-produces the show with fellow Chicago “Second City” alum Nate DuFort, and the two have brought along hours of entertainment that speaks directly to the hearts of horror fans everywhere. Each episode is around a half-hour, allowing the perfect time for binge-listening or a great distraction during your morning commute.

In no particular order, here are my Top 5 favorite episodes:

1) The Blair Witch Project with TJ Jagodowski (Listen Here!)

2) The Omen with Alan Linic (Listen Here!)

3) Poltergeist with Paul F. Tompkins and Tawny Newsome (Listen Here!)

4) Room 237 with Marty DeRosa and Sarah Shockey (Listen Here!)

5) It Follows with Jeff Murdoch (Listen Here!)

You can find My Neighbors Are Dead on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, Google Playor wherever else you get your podcast fix.

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Spend Halloween Night on George A. Romero’s Darkside

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There are a ton of Halloween specials to view from the shows of the past. Some of my favorites are from horror anthologies. While most people will go to “Tales from the Crypt,” my favorite has always been George A. Romero and Rubenstein’s “Tales from the Darkside.” I love the creepy atmospheric simple tune in the opening credits accompanied by the voice over: “Man lives in the sunlit world of what he believes to be reality. But there is unseen by most an underworld, a place that is just as real but not as brightly lit. A darkside.” It sends chills down my back every time.

“Crypt” was grandiose with its big Hollywood player production team and unrated sensibilities being on HBO, but that left Romero and his usual no budget crew to have to try harder and be cleverer with the constraints of their budget and censorship since “Darkside”was syndicated. The very first episode of the series debuted on October 29th with a Halloween-centric episode that perfectly captures the atmosphere of Halloween.

Episode 1 is written by George A Romero himself and directed by Bob Balaban of Close Encounters of the Third Kind fame, who also directed the little known horror comedy, My Boyfriend’s Back. This episode is entitled “Trick or Treat” and is to Halloween what A Christmas Carol is to Christmas. It’s about an old, snobbish rich man who has a lien on every single farm and family in the town as they all owe him money. Every Halloween, his favorite holiday, he takes the IOU’s of every family and hides them in his house among a slew of horrors that he controls in a master operations room. Each family sends a child to his house in a Halloween costume to try and find the IOU’s so their family can be debt free. No one has ever found the IOU’s as the old man always scares the children out of their minds with his house of horrors before they can find them.

The set up for the episode is totally Romero. The old man, Gideon Hackles, has his colleagues come to help him count his money and check his investments at three in the morning so as to not deter his ability to make money during the day. Hackles obsesses over every penny and trusts no one to handle his money without him there which is why he hates banks. The only thing this mean ass old man loves more than money is scaring the shit out of children. We watch the children go into the house and lose their shit, but there is one kid whose family doesn’t want him to compete. Little Timmy Muldoon wants so desperately to help his family out of debt, but his family refuse.

In the end, Gideon is haunted by true spirits from hell that begin throwing his money everywhere, but he doesn’t fear the spirits as much as he fears losing his money. He literally crawls down to hell to retrieve his cash! Little Timmy Muldoon comes to the door of the house and is greeted by a cackling witch, but is unafraid. The witch rides off on her broom throwing down the IOUs, money, jewels and all kinds of riches at Timmy, who just catches them, smiling. In that instant, with that giant grin on his face, Timmy Muldoon represents all of us horror fans that see these monsters as their friends and the holiday of Halloween as something to revere. The FX are a little hokey but this episode bursts with that low-budget Romero spirit and is a really fun and interesting idea that’s great for the Halloween season.

The second Halloween centric episode is from Season 2 and was directed by the Gore Master himself, Tom Savini! This episode also aired on October 27th and was written by Michael McDowell, who wrote Beetlejuice! The episode is entitled “Halloween Candy” and it’s a great little atmospheric one location thriller that showcased a lot of Savini’s and Mcdowell’s talents and inspirations.

Old Man Killup is the nastiest and meanest old man on the block with only his son to begrudgingly take care of him. Every year after Halloween, Killup’s son has to clean the outside of the house from all the kids trashing it because Killup refuses to give the kids candy. Killup’s son leaves a bunch of candy for him to give out, but the mean old man instead spends the night telling the kids to go to hell until finally he’s had it and throws together a hodgepodge of different slimy things to throw in a kid’s trick or treat basket. Just like Jason gets pissed off at pre-marital sex, a little goblin-like creature that seems like the precursor to Sam from Trick ‘r Treat gets pissed off when you mess with trick or treaters. He begins taunting and horrifying the old man well into the Halloween night.

The creature itself is, of course, done by Savini and seems like an evolution of Fluffy from Creepshow. Its movements are a lot of fun as it moves around like a demonic acrobat and uses that to freak out Killup. The Goblin even haunts his dreams with imagery and foreshadowing of his fate. It’s a heavily underrated Savini creation and even more interesting that he gets to bring this creature to life from idea to screen as the director himself.

The passage of time and decay plays a big role in this episode. Killup is constantly hungry, stating that in his old age there’s nothing to do but eat. At one point the little goblin tears off Killup’s watch and Killup accidentally steps on it. This is a point where Killup continuously tries to fall asleep in hopes of passing through Halloween without any more kids or surprises, but as he keeps on starving, the night does not change and he is trapped, frozen in time. Even as he tries to eat the food he has in his fridge, it goes bad and decays with roaches erupting from it. It’s a really cool device that juxtaposes the passage of time in his house with his own internal clock of life. One cannot simply pass through Halloween night without honoring tradition.

It’s a great tension builder and the night is so perfectly emphasized by the blue lighting representing the moonlight. Savini’s directing skills are really showcased with how minimalistic the setup is, but still manages to build so much tension.

When you’re checking out all the Halloween offerings for the season be sure to give these episodes a revisit or a first time watch as they are fun as hell! If you’ve got Shudder they’re streaming on there or go out and buy the new home video releases!

Tales From the Darkside

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Trick-or-Sweetheart: Halloween Was Oddly Romantic in Victorian Times

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We love Halloween horror. We dress up as rotting zombies or gory murder victims; we tell terrifying tales by a crackling campfire; and we watch slasher flicks with the most gruesome death scenes ever. Halloween is supposed to be scary, amiright?

But Victorian Valentine’s Day, er, Halloween, was quite a departure from what it is today. Back in the 1800s it was more about matchmaking and marriage than masks and machetes. Spiritualism was in vogue – what with seances and fairy photography – and so exploring the secrets of the unknown was more of a draw than being scary or getting scared.

Halloween made its debut into American society in the 1870s, though by then fall-time superstitions thrived among immigrants and ethnic groups. The holiday was pretty much considered a quaint custom of the Scottish and English, but its practice was not necessarily encouraged. It had “shameful” Pagan roots, after all.

However, stories about Halloween were featured in periodicals and ladies’ journals like Godey’s and Petersons in order to satisfy a readership eager for tawdry tales. They wanted to learn about ancient rituals, historical facts, and romance. Yep, at the time it was believed that the dearly departed could help you get a little action.

Victorian Era Halloween Greeting Cards:

All Hallows-themed fiction published in in the penny dreadfuls were often about “death by passion.” These untimely exits from the moral coil may or may not have spawned ghosts. Female readers devoured bodice-rippers with such titles as “Love’s Seed-time and Harvest,” “Love Lies A-Bleeding” and “If I Were a Man I’d Shoot Myself.” In 1881, St. Nicholas Magazine printed an article lamenting the demise of an Old-World holiday by turning it into an excuse to party: “Belief in magic is passing away, and the customs of All-hallow Eve have arrived at the last stage; for they have become mere sports, repeated from year to year like holiday celebrations.” Oh, the horror. And candy corn wasn’t even invented yet. (It came along a few years later, in 1888.)

The first Halloween parties were meant for matchmaking. Parlor games were played, everything from candlestick jumping to bobbing for apples, but one of the most popular was called “The Bible Trick.” Here’s how it works: Get a Bible and place a key between the pages, leaving the rounded portion sticking out. While the Bible is being supported by the fingers of two boys, hopeful girls recite these words: “If the initial of my future husband’s name begins with A turn, key turn.” Slowly repeat the letters of the alphabet, and when the right initial is reached the key will swing around and the Bible will fall. (Sounds boring AF, but hey – there was no Shudder or Chiller back then.) Another game instructed a couple to write their names on nut shells and then cast them into the fire; if the shell cracked they were in for a rough year, if the shell blackened but did not break they were going to marry. And here’s one last corker: Single young women were sent into a dark room and told to select one from a variety of boxes, each containing an object that had some sort of amorous significance for the year to come. What was actually in those boxes, we don’t know… but there were steam-powered dildos, “ladies syringes,” and hand-cranked vibration devices back then. (I’m just sayin’!)

A Victorian Dildo

The turn of the century heralded the end of the Victorian Era, and hence the women’s mags took an intellectual and proper turn: travel, politics, history and current events took the places of fiction and romance to meet the needs of their changing readership. Halloween parties were still popular, but adults seldom dressed in costumes for the occasion. Trick or treating became popular in the 1920s and 30s and the celebration of Halloween was given over almost entirely to children.

That’s not to say some folks don’t still consider Halloween an occasion for amour. After all, why else are sexy adult costumes the biggest sellers in America year after year? And perhaps the most romantic thing of all is when Rob Zombie married Sheri Moon on October 31. The couple will celebrate their 15th wedding anniversary this Halloween. Awwww. Cue the heavy-metal violins!

Happy Anniversary Mr. and Mrs. Zombie, and thank ya very much!

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