B-Sides – Americans Never Say Die

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For this Fourth of July weekend we bid adieu to the horror genre for an inspirational Eighties theme song from a classic Eighties slice of cinematic jingoism. American cheese doesn’t come any cheesier than this signature song or its fab-u-lous music video.

Ah, 1980’s cinema! Back when Middle Eastern terrorists were treated as being only slightly more competent than Dastardly & Muttley and a movie could be made in which a hotshot high school senior and an old fighter pilot could all but single-handedly defeat an entire Arab country’s military force just to save the life of a single captive American. Such was the premise of the 1986 flag-waving flyboy fantasy Iron Eagle.

Ronald Reagan famously amended the US Constitution shortly after becoming President to make it legally mandatory that all patriotic movies of this era much have at least one theme song that was either extremely jingoistic and/or boasted lyrics that enlisted men would want to listen to in preparation for battle. “Never Say Die (Iron Eagle)” by the short-lived glam metal band King Kobra is more the latter, but its music video is most definitely the former.

Academy Award winner Louis Gossett, Jr. reprises his non-Academy Award winning role from Iron Eagle to whip the hair metal band into top gun fighting shape. Nothing says military readiness quite like Hitler youth and Freddie Mercury look-a-likes in short shorts working out and singing while jogging on a treadmill superimposed in front of the American flag. The video really is more “don’t ask, don’t tell” than “never say die”.

Fun trivia fact: King Kobra’s lead vocalist would undergo a sex change operation in 1993.

Iron Eagle star Jason Gedrick also makes a cameo in the video, apparently, only under the condition he be barely seen and never heard.

Your Independence Day B-Sides edition salutes King Kobra as they serenade the United States of America with their feel-good masterwork “Never Say Die (Iron Eagle)”.

B-Sides - Americans Never Say Die

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  • Cinemascribe

    Way to go, Foy.You may have just posted the one video that would compel people to desert.

    “What the hell do you think we are,machines?”

    No,just a lousy 80’s glam rock band. Seriously,though. I was fifteen when Iron Eagle (aka “the Kmart version of “Top Gun””, Clerks II paraphrase intentional) bowed and this video aired. A lot of people from my generation often lament the decision by Mtv to eventually abandon the twenty-four hour a day music video format which launched the original network. I dunno,man. Between Kobra Comman-er King Kobra here and ridiculous one-shot wonders like the group Box of Frogs (and don’t I wish I was only making that one up), I’m not sure the decision to bail on nonstop music videos was necessarily a bad move. Clearly the quality of the end product was already in a state of decline. Def Leppard these guys ain’t.


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